Mid Summer

forty three,

Finals were the most stressful time for students, no matter which.

Good students and not as good students alike, acne would be popping up on their foreheads and cheeks from how much stress they were going under.

Like; Jeno, Mark, Donghyuck and Jaemin. Oh. And Renjun.

Renjun, who Jeno hasn't spoken to yet. Renjun, who Mark hasn't spoken to yet.

Huang Renjun, who Donghyuck and Jaemin haven't been able to leave alone.

But that wasn't what was important right now.

What was important was how much Mark was overworking himself during this stressful time. For Donghyuck, it wasn't something new, he's seen Mark overwork himself a lot, to the point of pure exhaustion, over school work, projects and tests. But Jeno and Jaemin? They were both really terrified for the well being of their hyung, for the well being of their boyfriend.

Even when Donghyuck tried to calm them down and tell them it would pass, he couldn't convince the other two because he himself didn't really believe his words. High school stress was something, but the stress Mark was going through right now was a completely different story.

"He's normally not like this," Donghyuck notes with a frown on his face. Jaemin and him were eating lunch in the university's canteen when the younger made a joke about how Mark was barely home nowadays. Donghyuck was picking at the corn in his salad when Jaemin had said that, and took it a bit too seriously as he continued to talk about how Mark normally isn't stressing that much. "But I guess there's more stress to it now that we're in university," he comments, turning to look at Jaemin. He was doing some math homework, a half eaten apple on the table beside his open textbook. "Are you gonna finish that?"

Jaemin looks up at Donghyuck when he asks, eyes flickering back to the apple before shrugging and answering the question.

"Yours if you want it." So Donghyuck takes it, claiming it as his own by taking a bite and leaving it beside his salad. "What were you saying about more stress?"

"Mark hyung always perfected things in high school, and it was a sign of professionalism I guess. But now it's just overworking himself raw, down to the bone," Donghyuck sighs, stabbing some lettuce with his plastic fork. "I'm sure he'll get over it soon, he's really good at pacing himself."

Jaemin takes a deep breath, nudging Donghyuck's foot under the table for the heck of it, before sighing out and continuing with his homework.

"I hope so. Jeno... Jeno may not seem worried, but he kinda is." Jaemin assures, toying with his pencil. "He just shows his emotions in a... Different way."

——

"Wanna practice?"

"It's kinda cold," Jeno admits, scrunching up his nose and pushing his bangs back. "I'll go with you to the indoor field."

"Okay."

So Mark waits by the door as Jeno puts on some soccer shorts and running shoes. He already has on a sweatshirt, an orange one which does his stark black hair justice.

"What's the occasion?" Jeno asks once they're walking across campus, swinging their joined hands between them.

"Kinda stressed y'know? I just need to... Let it off I guess?" Mark explains. He did that sometimes, takes something which he loves, or a hobby, he sometimes uses it to let off steam or stress, anger, feelings or anything really if he needed to. It was easy like that, and it worked. God knows Mark would rather suppress his feelings than talk openly about them.

"I get it," Jeno answers, smiling softly and turning his head to look at Mark. He rubs a thumb over the elder's knuckles before speaking. "If you want to say anything, if you need anything, you know that I'm here for you, right?" He asks gently, not really expected an answer in return. "We all are."

Mark knew what (who?) Jeno meant when he said 'all', and Mark thinks he's really lucky to have so many amazing people in his life. But he won't think about it too long, thinking of all of them, Mark might just crack. And he's trying too hard not to crack, too hard to break down now.

"Yeah. Thanks."

When Mark and Jeno arrive at the indoor soccer field, they weren't expecting to find Jaehyun there.

"Hey guys," Jaehyun greets, dimpled smile on display. He waves his hand, walking closer to the two youngest. Jaehyun was wearing athletic clothes, and he either finished practicing or was going to start practicing. "Practicing?"

"Yeah," Mark answers for the both of them, placing his duffel bag down on the ground. They were already inside the change rooms anyways. "You?"

"Just finished."

It was only when Jaehyun said those words that Jeno noticed the light sheen of sweat on his forehead and neck.

"Oh well, enjoy the rest of your day," Jeno says, waiting for Mark so that the both of them could start their practice.

"Yeah, you guys too. And hey," Jaehyun adds, grabbing the attention of the two boys who were about to leave the change room. "Come out with us again. It was really fun, all of us." Mark and Jeno knows that the elder means to make another plan with all eighteen of them, and as much as the younger two were eager and open to the proposition, it was almost impossible to find a day where everyone was available.

"For sure," Mark answers nonetheless, waving a final goodbye to the elder before turning around end leading Jeno out into the artificial green grass.

As much as 'practicing' was just Mark and Jeno passing a ball between them and both alternating between who was playing goalie, it was still something Mark needed a lot at the moment.

Stress was always something which ate at him, and he knows that. He accepts that and he understands that he does a lot with his life, that the main cause of his stress was himself. But he couldn't be happier with his life, he really couldn't be. He has soulmates, he has good grades, he has a family and friends and there isn't anything Mark would trade for any of that.

But it's hard. It's also really hard, to just sit there and take it. To, year after year, sit there and take all the stress, all the long days, late nights, lonely nights.

It's insanely difficult and that's why he deals with it on his own. To being someone else into it, to drag other people into his pity problems? That wasn't something he was entirely keen on doing. It was his own shit anyways, no one else's.

——

"Surprise!"

"Hi?"

"It's not really a surprise if I told you we'd be here."

"Shut the fuck up, you're no fun."

"You know what Lee Donghyuck—"

"Hey," Jaemin greets, wrapping his arms around Mark's neck. Jaemin notices how tired the elder looks when he smiles back, eyes droopy and cheeks sunken. "Feeling alright?"

Mark simply hums, and if Jaemin felt how Mark leaned more of his weight onto him, he doesn't say anything. He only hugs Mark tighter, kissing his cheek and petting the hair at his nape.

However, he bites his tongue before he can say too much.

__________

simon says we a real vibe killer