What A Lie Looks Like | ✓

2.21: sephine

The next day, the headlines in the newspaper were an exposé about my past, just as Hayes's dad had predicted weeks ago. Something I should have expected, but still hoped wouldn't happen. I grab the magazines off the table and walk quickly to the couch before turning the television on, flicking it to TMZ.

The bottom of the screen reads: Hayes Benson's fiancé isn't quite the sweetheart she appears to be, and my stomach drops.

Lesli Arnolds is smiling widely and wearing a simple blue blazer. "Hey, guys! Welcome back to my segment, where we catch up on the latest gossip. If you haven't heard of Sephine Montgomery by now, then you must be living under a rock because she's been featured everywhere." A picture of Hayes and I getting coffee in Texas appears on the screen. "She's also known as the ballerina who recently stole billionaire Hayes Benson's heart. Yes, that Hayes Benson." She smirks, and a new picture of Hayes pops up of him from a few years ago I'm presuming. "I mean, look how in love they are in their engagement photos, folks." A few of our engagement photos show up.

"Now we know that Sephine has been taking a break from dancing after she fell during a routine in Toronto two months ago, and I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone." A clip from the festival starts to play, and I see myself on screen taking the running steps towards Ollie. I close my eyes, but I can still hear the gasp of who took the video, and then the clip stops. "Now that certainly looks like it hurt. Poor girl."

"Yeah, I'm sure you feel so sorry for me," I grumble, waiting for her to continue to the part I know she's going to cover.

"Yesterday, the ballerina was spotted attending a narcotics anonymous meeting, but I think the real question would be why she was attending one in the first place? So my team and I did some digging. We found that Sephine had quite the addiction to over the counter medicine while she was attending Bayard Academy, a boarding school in Seattle that is known for creating top tier dancers and other artistic occupations. However, this was all swept underneath the covers. But, it was revealed in quite the scandal almost a year later that led to the resignation of former Senator Montgomery from Maryland. Yikes!"

Hayes's dad was right. They did find out.

Lesli smiles softly into the camera, "But does the fact that she was seen attending a meeting mean that a relapse is coming? We have reports from a close friend to the couple that says Sephine is struggling to adapt to the new lifestyle after living out of the public eye for so long. But I can personally say that I hope she's doing okay because everyone makes mistakes, and it seems as if she's made quite the life for herself after getting clean. Even though it means I'll probably never get my shot with Hayes, this is one couple I'm rooting for to last. Make sure you tune in after the break! We'll be covering the dirty details in the nasty break up between Lily Weiss and Dylan Reed."

I rest my head on my knee while taking a deep breath, letting myself process the fact that my addiction has now been made public once again. It doesn't matter to people if I'm almost eight years clean or not. To them, it's some joke, and something that they can make money off of.

So I let myself slip in the way they've predicted. I wander to the bathroom where there are pills behind the mirror. I brace my hands on the sink as I stare at myself. Is this really who I want to go back to being again? The pills would set me back eight years of recovery. Eight years of being clean.

The memory of being high is still clear as day in my brain. My fingers twitch to unscrew the cap and pop one in my mouth. But I'd break every ounce of trust I've gained from Hayes if I did that.

I grab the bottle with shaky hands, hearing the pills rattle on the inside. I twist off the top, pouring them into my hand. The white pills contrast faintly with my pale skin.