I Saw Her

21st August, 2019

Dear Diary,

So today was the day for auditions for the male actor lead role, the one who'd play opposite Sofia. I came as early as possible, and this morning I decided not to get coffee. I didn't want to go through all that happened yesterday once again, except the part where I met Sofia. Once again I brought my cap. I had inadequate sleep last night as I kept thinking about Sofia all night.

Alright, so basically the first 10 performers were the worst performers in the world because I could see Swill busy eating. If I had a dollar for every time Swill was eating, I'd be the richest person in the world. A few performances later, I heard a familiar voice while I was walking backstage. I looked in the corner, and Sofia was there. I melted into water. I started to daydream. Thinking about being with her. She was in the corner talking to someone. She looked at me and immediately started to wave her hand towards me. I raised my hand to wave back when someone pushed me.

A guy with his hand up in the air walked to her and they hugged. Either they hugged for a long time or it felt like one for me. She didn't even look at my direction after the hug. It's like she didn't even notice me. I tried to assume that she didn't look at me and I proceeded towards her. "Hey Sofia." She looked at me, "I'm sorry, don't I know you from somewhere?" To quote a quite popular show, 'my heart sank'. I guess, maybe that's what the heart feels like when something like this happened. The heart feels heavier, as if every tension, pressure, stress and other things in the world falls on the heart. It brings about a feeling of sadness which makes the heart feel heavier.

I wished to leave the conversation, but I didn't want to make things awkward. "Yeah, we have, yesterday at the café. I'm Ducky." "Oh yeah, now I remember you partially. Well this is a friend of mine, Axel Marsh. He's here to audition just for fun. And this here is my best friend, Hobart Jax. He's here to actually audition for the role. I hope he gets the lead role." They raised their hands for a handshake which I wasn't really keen on. But then I didn't want to embarrass myself in the eyes of Sofia. I wanted to have a good friendship with her friends so I could actually have a chance with her.

As I shook their hand, I was waiting for her to ask what I was doing here. But she didn't ask me. She just continued her conversation with Axel and Hobart as all three of them went back to ignoring me. I didn't have anything to say after the way she ignored me, so I went back to the stage for the next set of auditions. Once again I put on my cap and sat down trying to sleep. This time I couldn't sleep though because Swill was chewing so loudly. "Geez are you an elephant? Just stop munching loudly. You spend half your life on the tube and the other eating, when will you actually fill your stomach?" He looked at me with the corner of his eye and closed his food container. "Why did I bother coming here?"

Soon a familiar person came on stage. Hobart was on stage, "Hello, My name is Hobart Jax." Swill replied, "Alright, you have a great look, so just blow me away with your acting. Whoosh." Hobart pulled out a stick from his pocket and started tapping it on the ground. Swill whispered, "A method actor, oooooh I like it." I rolled my eyes as I tried my best not to look at Hobart. Once Hobart was done, Swill started to tear up again. I put down my cap on the table while Swill kept clapping. "You're in my film." As he pointed towards Hobart. We all could hear Sofia screaming as she ran towards Hobart. I rolled my eyes once again as I couldn't handle seeing it. She hugged Hobart tightly. "Thanks Mr. Swill for choosing us." I put my cap on. She looked at me, "I'm pretty sure I don't know you." I ignored that sentence as I started to leave through the back door. "He's just the writer of the film, the real mastermind behind the story. I'll let you know the details, just leave your numbers with her." He picked up his food containers and ran to me.

"Hey wait up, what's wrong with you? You seem a little sad?" He asked me. "Nothing, just that love is a very complicated thing. You're lucky to never feel it." He stopped me putting his hands on my shoulders. "Hey champ, I'm not fully sure what's wrong with you, but you should cheer up. And you're wrong, I did feel it once. Once a girl would hang out with me a lot, by that I mean a lot. I naturally felt that she liked me. It turned out that when I asked her out, she was incredibly mean to me. She was mean to me every day of my life. When she wanted to talk to me in isolation, I felt like she wanted to apologize and confess but then she was even more mean to me. Since then I haven't felt the same again." I jerked his hands off my shoulders. "Just stop, this thing never happened to you at all. A girl did like you, but then she started to be mean to her after you started to eat her food instead of her." I could see the disgust of Swill's face. "Yuck man, I shouldn't have said anything. You're a snake, just like that girl who wouldn't share her food. Anyways I'll call you when the shooting will be ready." I left the theatre and headed home.