Something Like Shame (BWWM)

Chapter 8

...it was hard to stay away for too long. I was her satellite...

I found him pacing back and forth through the parking lot. His face was beet red and he was shivering. At the sight of me, he raked a hand through his hair and continued tossing rocks at the parked cars, careful not to hit the ones that looked like they had working alarm systems. He'd already broken two windows.

I kept myself at a safe distance, knowing that an angry Seth was not a safe one, "Tell me about the dam."

It was as if I hadn't even spoke. "Do you know how many late nights I had to spend at work, putting in overtime to pay for this damned sweater?" He didn't wait for an answer. The sweater was nice, though. It actually clung to the tiny bit of a physique he did have because, well, Seth kind of needed it. He had a bit of an awkward build. Not only was he tall but he was not a fan of physical exertion so he was a bit pudgy too, "I went in for exactly three weeks and took maybe five days off, altogether. That's why I haven't been in school lately. I was preparing for this trip. But, you didn't even notice, huh, Henna? It was all about the art for you, right?"

By now, I knew he didn't want an answer so I let him continue.

"I actually picked this exact sweater because there was a time that you and I, well," He rubbed a hand on the back of his neck and blushed even harder. His blue eyes were cast down at his feet, "we were actually almost a thing. And that was what held me over when hamburger-meat-for-hands Carlos slammed me against the walls when I was walking to class; when Bryce pulled down my pants while I was getting lunch." He heaved a sigh, "One day, I guess Bryce learned how to spell and he decided to write 'Seth loves cock' in all caps on every shirt I wore to school for weeks on end. It was stupid, but he never got tired of it. Anyway, I pulled out a hoodie from a trip I'd taken to the aquarium and you smiled. You said that I should wear blue more often. It brings out my eyes, remember?

It was like something dawned on me, Henna. Like, you were the only person that I could trust in the school. Why not give us a chance, right?" He glanced at me before chucking a sharp-looking rock at a red cruiser. It hit the window with a crash and the car immediately flashed its lights and started beeping. Seth spoke over the horns, "Was I right to think that?"

Even though my mouth had suddenly evaporated into sawdust, I still tried to say, "Maybe." Now was not the time for misunderstanding.

"Nope. Apparently, I was wrong to even think that much." He shook his head and began taking slow steps away from me, "As for the dam, Henna, it's miles high and hundreds of yards thick. But it has a gaping hole, nonetheless. That hole is festering with questions. And there is no real way to answer them without facing it head-on. Especially when there are lives at stake-"

At that moment, we both heard a commotion behind us. I turned and walked back to the hotel, to my responsibilities. Seth, however, went the opposite direction until he was across the street and in the shadows of one of the alleyways. I couldn't follow him this time. He had issues that I just could not fix.

My phone began to buzz just then. A picture of Ricky in his hippy sun-glasses was on the screen and I answered it.

"Hey, girl!" I could hear the pulse of music in the background.

"Where are you guys?"

"Linda, Stephanie, and I? We're just on our way out to eat. So, how about you? Are you too busy to face-time with us while you go do your art stuff or is that too much for the Birthday Girl to ask?" His tone was telling me that it was not so I immediately switched the camera on so they could see me and the wreckage. "Ohmygoodness! Henna, where the fuck do they have you staying? Bate's Motel or some shit?"