Presence (Cashby)

Girls love boys

I tap my pen on my chin while sitting on the bed, trying to figure out this math problem.

"Hey Alan?" Austin says from across the room putting his book down. "Do you ever have trouble?"

I look over at him in confusion."with what?"

"With you know" he says making awkward hand gestures

It takes me a minute to realize he was asking if I ever have trouble getting a boner. " ew. Dude were not talking about this" wait did he just admit to me he was having problems in bed?

He sighs going back to his reading. A minute later he puts his book down. "Are you a virgin?"

"No" I defend.

"Then why are you afraid to talk about boners?"

I look at him with a cringe. "Guys don't do that"

He shrugs. "Well if you sleep with Lola imma fuck you up"

"Why?"

"She's my goddamn ex that's why" well that escalated quickly.

"Well you're safe" I mutter " I don't want her anyways"

"Oh" he laughs "you're a circle."

"No. I'm not gay. I just don't do one night stands. Especially with bitchy girls"

He looks at me "you got the bitch part right at least"

I sigh returning to my math.

"Those pills you got don't get you high" he interrupts again.

"I know. I told you" I glance at the clock. Twelve at night. I'm so done. I slam my math book shut and turn off my lamp. Letting the stress fade away into the night.

"Your a disgrace of a son" a familiar voice echoes.

"Mom?" I call out to the darkness.

"I never loved you"

"You were the best mom ever"

"Just like you're dad. God. I could barely stand to look at you"

"Mom...." My voice whimpers out to the darkness.

I was awoken by to my head in Austin's lap hand him gently petting my hair.

"Ah, what the fuck?" I pop up.

"You had a bad dream last night. I couldn't even wake you up."

"And?"

"And. I soothed you down so you wouldn't wake up the whole god damn dorm"

I sigh pushing myself up. "Thanks" I mumble.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He says. Actually showing kindness and not hostility.

"Not really" I say throwing on a shirt. I turn around to see him staring lustfully at me "you mind?"

He shakes his head and puts on a sweatshirt. "I lost my mum too when I was young" a flash of pain echoes through his eyes.

"I'm sorry" I mutter before heading out the door. A strong force yanks me back by the backpack sending my phone flying down the hall into Danny's head.

"Tell anyone that I was kind or what we talked about and your dead meat" Austin growls into my ear. Once he lets go I run up to Danny and apologize about the phone.

"That looked intensely angry" Danny comments.

I see Austin making a 'don't you fucking dare' face in my direction. "Yeah. I guess"

"Be careful" he says before we part classes. Austin was actually on time for English today and he plops down next to me. Through out the class he keeps sneaking glances at me and it's really starting to freak me out.