Banana Fish Oneshots

Lucky

Despite everything Ash had to go through in life, he would consider himself... lucky. It sounds absurd and it is. His childhood was messed up - even that is an understatement. He went through things no child, no person should ever go through. Being whored out to old, disgusting perverts, raped and objectified every single day and having to learn to kill to survive in this world before he even reached the age of thirteen... 

Losing his parents and losing his brother... losing everyone he held dear to his heart made him think that maybe he was destined to live a life of solidarity... like a leopard, hidden in uncharted forests, far away from society and for a long time, he believed that. He believed he was doomed to be on his own. He accepted that maybe love... wasn't in his cards. 

That maybe, he didn't deserved to be loved. 

Life had made his heart hard - walled around steel and wrapped in barbed wires. Nothing could hurt him, because how can anything hurt him if nothing can enter his heart in the first place? And for a long time, he was content with that. The idea of forming bonds and deep, meaningful relationships didn't have much importance to him. The closest thing he had were... friends. Skipper and Shorter- even though Ash never would admit it out loud, were probably the only two people Ash cared about. 

Until Eiji appeared in his life. 

He remember their first time meeting. He remembered taking one glance at the Japanese boy and being completely entranced by the boy. Those endless dark eyes, all wide and innocent as he gazed around his gang hideout in shock. Never once did those eyes look at him with distaste or judgement - emotions that Ash would have expected. Instead, those sweet eyes looked at him with awe and admiration and it made Ash's heart spin around its own axis. 

It confused the American and part of him wondered if Eiji was stupid or just plain naive about Ash's world. A world filled with guns, drugs and violence. A world that was completely new to Eiji. 

A world Eiji didn't belong in. 

To him, Eiji was the embodiment of everything good in humanity. Kind, gentle, caring, loving and accepting... He accepted everything surrounding Ash, even the dark and dirty sides of his past. He accepted all his flaws and troubles with no complaints. He accepted the unsteady life being with Ash would bring. 

He stood by Ash's side, holding his hand whenever he needed to, through all the good times and the bad times. He loved him so deeply but never expected anything back. It was as if he was content with just having Ash by his side.

He didn't believe in true love or love at all. He didn't even think he was capable of loving someone so intensely. His heart had been shattered over and over again with every person he lost and every moment he had to spread his legs. He sheltered his heart, building walls brick by brick until it reached the heights no person could ever scale.

But Eiji... 

He flew over those walls, sailing through the skies like he did months ago. He jumped over them so effortlessly and all Ash could do was watch him infiltrate through the very barriers that were meant to keep everyone out. He breezed into his life, bringing along things Ash never got to experience when he was a child.

Eiji brought love, light and happiness into his bleak, dark life.

More than that... Eiji brought a sense of belonging, a home that Ash could always come back to. 

Eiji was his home, his safe space where he could turn to when he was vulnerable and Eiji would accept him with open arms and hold him until all the pain went away. 

Now, laying in bed in their tiny New York apartment, Ash turned to his side with one arm tucked underneath his head and the other laying limply over his torso. His jade eyes shimmered softly with adoration as he gazed at the sleeping boy beside him. Adoration Ash never really voiced out but he knew that Eiji knew. His eyes roved over the young, innocent face as he took in the soft skin, delicate nose and thin, pink lips. A small smile graced his face and he moved his limp hand to gently cup Eiji's cheek. His thumb rubbed Eiji's slightly defined cheekbone with love before he slid his hand down over Eiji's bicep and to his waist, reaching around and slowly pulling the smaller boy closer to him. 

"Hnn.." Eiji hummed, smiling in his sleep. He shifted closer towards Ash, moving towards the warm body and placing his head on the blond's shoulder. Eiji's eyes remained closed but his lips moved, mumbling something so softly under his breath. 

"I... love you. Ash." He whispered before settling back to sleep with his arm wrapped around Ash's thin torso. 

Ash's breath hitched, hearing those words being whispered so... lovingly. Before he knew it, tears began to form in his eyes. A swell of warmth bloomed in his chest, making his heart go haywire in emotions. He choked softly on his breath before surging his head forward, placing it in the juncture of Eiji's neck. He held the boy tighter, bringing him closer to his body, afraid that if he let go, Eiji would disappear.

And Ash didn't think he could survive if that happened. 

He shifted his jade eyes to look up at the cloudy New York skies, gazing at the moon with a smile before finally letting his exhaustion win over and bring him to sleep.

The world may have tried to beat him down, break his soul and shattered his heart but it also brought Eiji into his life. It gave him the chance to experience something not many people get to experience in their life...

True love.

And for that, Ash considered himself the luckiest man in the world. 

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Another little drabble for you guys. I'm fucking balls deep in Banana Fish hell and I will let it continue to drag me xD 

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed!