Necessity

Chapter Thirteen

We finally arrived at Chresanto's house and I wanted nothing more than to jump in my car and drive as far away from here as possible. The entire car ride back to Miami was one of the most uncomfortable rides that I had ever experienced. I couldn't even look at Chresanto because I knew that if I did, my chest would begin to hurt like it always did whenever I wasn't in good standing with him. It was bad enough that our late night love-hate incident was on repeat in my head. The tension between us was so thick and I could tell that Zonnique and Cedric could sense it. Cedric kept looking at me through his rear view mirror as if to make sure that I wasn't on the verge of a breakdown even though  I most definitely was. And quite honestly, it was taking every bit of willpower that I had left to not show it. As for Zonnique, I could tell that she knew something was up with me back at the hotel. Whenever I have something heavy on my mind, I'm unusually quiet so this morning as we were packing up our belongings it was so silent that you could hear a pin drop. She didn't ask me anything about what happened though because she knew whatever it was had to do with Chresanto and I never talked about my issues with him in from of Deon. I didn't ever want my relationship with his father to affect the way he felt about him even if he was too young to understand anything that was going on right now. Deon would be staying with Chresanto though so I knew that once Zonnique and I finally got into my car, she was going to want all of the information regarding last night. However truthfully, I didn't know if I wanted to talk about it because talking about it would be like reliving it. 

"Ight y'all" Cedric said as he put the car in park. "Get on out"

Chresanto took Deon out of his car seat before getting out of the car himself.

"Roc, lemme see my baby real quick before I go" Zonnique said walking toward him.

"Your baby?" he said with a raised eyebrow. "You owe me some money then"

"Oh hush" she waved him off.

I walked toward the trunk of the car where Cedric was taking out everyone's luggage.

"You straight?" he asked me before handing me my duffle bag.

I knew he had been wanting to ask me that the entire car ride. I couldn't even lie and say that I was fine because I was so far from it. So I just took the bag from him and shook my head earning a sympathetic look from him. I hated that look. That "Damn, this girl can never win" look. It was why I kept so many of my thoughts and feelings to myself because I could almost always expect to get that look every time. Chresanto used to be the only person I could talk to about what I was feeling and he would make me feel heard like I wasn't crazy. It hurts to think that at one point we were life partners and now we were hardly cordial. 

"Anything I can do?" Cedric asked. 

That was what I loved about him. Cedric was kind of like a pineapple: hard on the outside but really sweet on the inside. He was one of the most compassionate people I knew. Despite the fact that I had cheated on and hurt one of his good friends, he still couldn't help but to be concerned about me. Unfortunately, he couldn't fix everything.

"No, Ced, but thank you. Right now, I just need to get home is all" I said looking over his shoulder to see Zonnique handing Deon back to Chresanto.

"Ight well just let me know if you need anything, okay? I got you" Cedric replied.

"I know" I said before we embraced each other.

Cedric was starting to feel like the big brother I never had. 

"Okay, okay break it up you saps" Zonnique teased as she approached the car. "Cedric, would you be a gentleman and please hand me my bag? I gotta bed to get back to"