My Love, My Life

She was standing behind the door of his, no, their, bedroom. This was the moment she had been dreaming of more than imaginable during the past two years. Hundreds and hundreds of times she had pictured this scene in her head and it had kept her going even when its coming true had seemed almost impossible. Her Sam. She would finally see Her Sam. Oh, how she had longed him to touch and to hold her. How much she had missed his calming voice, his deep, rusty laugh, the way his eyes sparkled when he looked at her, the way only Sam could ever make her feel. But now that it was actually happening, Donna felt scared.
What is going to happen? What if after such heartbreak her assumed death had caused, there would never be going back?

The thought of that had never even crossed her mind. She started to think about all the pain she had caused to everyone around her, especially to Sam. Sophie had Sky and now she even had her own, wonderful son. Rosie and Tanya had eachother and of course, she smiled at the thought, Rosie would have Bill from now on. But Sam, Sam had no one. She felt her heart shattering into pieces. Two years. Two damn, long years. First living in the unbearable darkness of what had happened to her and then her death announcement. Two years of mourning someone he hadn't even got a chance to say goodbye. How was he going to react when he would find out that she was alive after all?

Suddenly she heard something from inside the room. It sounded like singing. Was Sam singing to someone? What if he had moved on after all?
She had to know. She knew seeing Sam with someone else would kill her, but she had to know.

Her heart pounding fast, she opened the door slightly.

Sam was sitting by the window. Donna felt her heart shatter just a bit more when she saw what he was looking at. It was a picture of the two of them on their wedding day, right after the Aphrodite's fountain had cracked. Sam's hoarse, low voice echoed through the room:
" ...But I know I don't posess you, so go away, God bless you. You are still my love and my life... "

Donna felt a tear running down her cheek. How could she have thought Sam had moved on? Quietly, she stepped into the room and started to sing along:
"Yes, I know I don't posess you, with all my heart, God bless you, you will be my love and my life..."
At this point Sam turned around. For a few seconds they both just stared at each other, singing.
"...You're my one and only..."

The song ended. A few seconds passed. Neither were able to find anything to say.

"My darling Sam..." Donna whispered. Now the tears were pouring down her cheeks. Sam's eyes, once so full of happiness and light, were now filled with pain that Donna could tell was constant.
"Please, tell me you've come to take me with you," his tone was pleading.
"I am so sorry, my love, so sorry..."
In a second Sam's tone changed from pleading to angry:
"No, you can't do this to me. Not again. You can't just leave without taking me with you. No, you cannot do that twice. I cannot go through that twice."
Watching Sam Donna didn't know which would have been worse, to see Sam in a pain like this or to find him with someone else. Surely the second option would have broken her heart, but at least he would have been happy and she would have done anything to make Sam happy, even if it cost her her own happiness.

Donna took a step towards Sam.

"No, Sam, you don't have to. It's me, Donna. I am not dead, I have never been."
Sam shook his head.
"NO NO NO NO!!! That's not possible!! Your ship sunk!! No one survived!" he was almost yelling. The desperation in his voice was so evitable. How could she ever have thought Sam didn't love her?

Two goddamn years have passed and this is how he's doing...

She couldn't even imagine what it must have been like right after the news of her death. Now it wasn't only Sam who was in pain, Donna was hurting with him.