Friends?

41

   Jah told the police and his management team is in custody awaiting trial.

  We had to go back to Florida and postpone the tour because of Jah's lack of management and his suicide scare. Right now Ski's making all the decisions for Jah that his management team would've had to make.

   The entirety of Jah's fans are blaming me for his suicide attempt and honestly I blame me too.

  Ski made me move back in with Jah to make sure he's okay.

  "Damnit," I say not being able to sleep.

  I toss and turn but I just feel guilt eating me up.

  I get up and run to the bathroom throwing up from guilt, hopefully.

   "This is the second time today you've thrown up. Are you sick or some shit?" Jah asks now holding my hair up.

   He looks down and sees me crying and gets a concerned look on his face.

  I brush my teeth and go to lay down but before I can walk out of the bathroom Jah grabs me by my waist and sits me down on the counter.

   "What's the matter?" He asks standing in between my legs with his hands on my hips.

  "Nothing, I'm fine, just a little sick," I say.

   "No you're not, now tell me," he says.

  "I...I feel guilty. I shouldn't have fucking left you, I shouldn't have just gave up on our relationship," I say.

  "Why do you feel guilty, I pushed you away?" He says.

   "Why did you try to kill yourself?" I ask.

  "I couldn't have you, you were out of my life and it seemed like it was for good," he says.

  "Exactly, you tried to kill yourself because I left, because I wouldn't stay," I say accepting that I'm the one who caused this.

  "But the thing is I pushed you away, in the end none of that was your fault. If it was you and someone else and you told me about a relationship like that I would tell you to fucking leave and beat the fucker who was treating you like that," he says.

"Bu-"

"But nothing, you didn't cause any of this. Now go to bed, I know you're tired," he assures.

The next day I wake up and Jah's not their. I would've gone downstairs but my stomach had other plans so I ran straight to the bathroom and puked.

I don't even feel guilty right now, what the fuck is wrong with me?

I walk downstairs and into the kitchen just to see part of Jah's body on the floor but the counter is block my from seeing the other half.

"JAH!" I scream thinking he OD'd again.

I run around the corner just to see him playing with Sora.

"God damnit you fucking asshole get off the floor!" I yell crying.

"What? Rose what's the matter?" He asks immediately getting up.

"I thought you OD'd again. I only saw part of you lying on the floor, I didn't see you were playing with Sora," I say still sobbing.

"I'm okay, it's okay," he says holding me and drying my tears.

All of a sudden I get the urge to puke again and I run to the bathroom. I puke then brush my teeth, the amount of tooth brushes I've went through this past week pisses me off.

"God damnit why can't I stop puking?" I ask starting to cry again.

"Why are you so emotional too?" Jah asks.

"I'm not emotional!" I yell angrily.

"Okay maybe I am," I admit after my little outburst.

We stand there and all of a sudden turn to each other having the same idea.

I look down at my stomach and just cry again.

"I'm not a good mother and I could never be one. I couldn't even have my first kid survive 6 months because of my dumbass, I'm no-"

"ROSE! You're a good mom, it's not your fault that someone fucking kidnapped you," he says stopping one of my emotional episodes.

"Can you get me some tests?" I ask wanting to know if we're right.

"Yeah," he says and kisses my cheek before leaving.

I nervously wait for him to get back.

"How many fans can be in one fucking Walmart? I had to take like 50 pictures with pregnancy tests in my hand, let's try explaining that to millions of fans," he says stressed.

He walks up to me holding the tests and gives them to me.

I go take them and I set the timer after taking them and sit down back on the couch.

Jah just looks down at me and kisses my head.

"What if I don't want it?" I ask Jah scared.

"Then I guess we'll just have to try another time," he says disappointed.

I don't exactly know if I want this baby but I can tell Jah wants it.

"Let's be honest we won't have to "try again" it'll just happen cause your pull out game trash," I laugh.

"Shut the fuck up," he laughs.

"Do you want the baby, if you're pregnant," he asks.

I think for a minute and nod.

"Yes, I want to just finally settle down, I don't really give a damn if I'm young, my life's to crazy and I just want a little bit of structure to it," I say laughing.

Right when I get done answering his question the timer beeps. We both hop up and run to the bathroom.

"What if I'm not pregnant," I say hesitating to go into the bathroom and look at the tests.

"Then we try," He says.

I smile and open the door. Positive. Every single one is positive.

I jump up and hug Jah.

"I'm gonna be a mom!" I cry.

"I'm gonna be a dad!" He yells excitedly making me laugh.

All of a sudden Jah gets a notification. He opens it and it's a DM from Ski saying "you wanna tell me something?" with a picture of Jah taking a picture with a fan while he has the pregnancy tests in his hand which had thousands of comments and likes.

"Fuck."