I'll Be Okay - Peter Maximoff & David Haller

Dancing with Death

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I started this on a word document and thought, why not make it a story on Wattpad? I also put this on Ao3. 

My user is culturaldecay.

I started this fic because I watched the newer X-Men movies. First Class, Days of Future Past, Apocalypse, and Dark Pheonix. I loved them all as I did with every movie marvel ever made. Except for Dark Pheonix, all my homies hate dark phoenix, no justice for my boy and dadneto.

I got into Evan Peters in American Horror Story and it was ironic that he was playing one of my favourite comic book characters in X-Men.

Plus Magneto has always been a favourite, and once I found out that the most powerful mutant that ever lived is Charles' son, and he has hella angst, I knew I had to write something to satisfy my little fantasy world in my head.

But PS Before you start reading this, you should be aware that the entire story is one big trigger warning. Self-harm, suicide, depression, graphic descriptions of ptsd, mentions of multiple eating disorders and behaviours, anxiety, panic attacks, kidnapping, mind control, and assault.

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He can't do this anymore, He couldn't just sit here and watch ​him​ go about the mansion like he had nothing. Peter looked into his eyes and saw nothing but guilt, sadness, and intimidating anger. He wished he could express that he forgave him, that Erik really does still have someone to care for. But it was fucking ​hard​. He never thought it would be so ​difficult​. Every time he attempted to tell him, he'd lose his entire train of thought and completely give up. You would think after 19 years of isolation from the truth, you'd want to meet your father and confront him.

But ​he was here​, right in front of him, and he couldn't get the words out of his mouth. He needed to leave, go somewhere to think, somewhere to weigh out his options, but he couldn't be alone. Whenever he ​was​, his mind seemed to crumble to pieces. He thought about what could be and who he really should be and he's ashamed of himself for how weak he really was behind this mask of cockiness and perfection. He hated himself for it with every fibre of his being. No one knew that or at least suspected, and god, does he panic when he thinks about scenarios of someone noticing, or catching him in the act.

He had a hard time admitting to himself that he was fucked up a ​long time ago​. His therapist said he had an eating disorder, and because of this (among other things), he self-harmed. It was a scary subject for most people, especially his mother. She never understood but was terrified at how good he was at hiding it all. He has Major Depressive Disorder, Insomnia, Bulimia, Hypersensitivity, and generalized anxiety. He tried not to think about it much, pretends its nothing, like it's not even there. It was hard to stay level-headed in a house full of powerful mutants when you know they can most definitely tell that you've got a few human diseases swimming around in your head, so Peter steers clear of the telepath(s). One time he accidentally let out a wretched thought in front of Charles, but luckily he had been too occupied with Erik to hear anyone else's thoughts at that moment.

Luck had surprisingly been on his side that day.

But today? Hell no. Luck didn't even seem to exist anymore. His idiotic brain managed to make it harder than it usually was and fucking gifted him two panic attacks during the hour he was supposed to teach, but luckily the class was almost always distracted, His own fault honestly. But he had made it out of the room before any of them realized his thoughts had turned completely sinister. This is one of his greatest fears.