Chapter 24: Hospitalization

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Emma wasn't hungry for any supper that night. She refused multiple requests from the nurses and her mom. All she wanted to do was sleep; she felt so exhausted. When her mom left for the night, a CNA came in to sit with Emma in her room. She looked like she was in her early twenties and all she did was watch movies on her iPad with one earbud in and one earbud out. Tomorrow morning, the doctor was going to put the feeding tube in and take Emma's catheter out. Then, they would possibly move her out of the ICU and to the pediatric floor.

In spite of being tired, Emma tossed and turned all night long. The hospital bed was not comfortable and her gown kept itching her neck. She had a terrible headache and was achy all over. Whenever Emma was just about to fall asleep, a nurse would open the door to check on her or her IV pump would beep, waking her right back up again. Finally, Emma pulled the blankets over her head and took off her itchy gown. She felt much better sleeping naked anyway. But needless to say, it was still a very long night.

Just as Emma was dozing off again, she heard her door creak open. "Emma," a gentle voice sounded. "We're gonna take out your catheter this morning."

As Emma stretched sleepily, she felt her blankets being pulled off of her to reveal a nurse with a dirty blonde ponytail and glasses. She was wearing the standard blue scrubs that everyone else was wearing so far. Emma then realized she was completely naked in front of her. She reached for the sheet to cover herself, but the nurse pulled it away. "I need to take your catheter out. Then you can go back to sleep," she stated. "Where is your gown?"

"It was itching me, so I took it off," Emma answered, a little embarrassed.

"Oh okay." The nurse put on gloves and started messing with Emma's catheter. "Okay, all done," she said after a moment, throwing the catheter in the trash can.

Emma hardly felt a thing; she looked down to see if it was really gone, and sure enough, it was.

"Now when you have to go to the bathroom, let us know, because we have to measure your urine for a while. Okay?"

"Okay," Emma replied, pulling the covers over her thin, bare body. She closed her eyes and tried to go back to sleep, but soon, the nurse was back in the room to give Emma her morning pills. Then, it was shift change, in which a new sitter came to sit with Emma. This one was a nurse with short, curly brown hair. She wore glasses as well and she was probably in her mid forties. She introduced herself as Karrie and informed Emma that she would be the one putting in her feeding tube.

As Emma watched another nurse enter the room with a bunch of supplies, she started to get extremely anxious. Would the feeding tube hurt? How were they going to put it in? What if they fed her too much and she got fat? Her mind raced with everything that could go wrong. With each moment that passed, her heart pounded faster and faster in her chest.

"Okay, Emma," Karrie said. "I'm going to sit you up in bed here and then we're going to put this tube down your nose." She pushed a button on Emma's bed which made the head go up, putting her in a sitting position. "While the tube goes down, you're going to feel like gagging, but I need you to keep swallowing as it goes down. Okay?" She put a pair of gloves on and then opened up a kit which included a long, snakelike tube, a bag, and a package of lubricant.

Seeing all the supplies made Emma even more panicky. Covering her face with her hands, she started hyperventilating. "I don't want the feeding tube!" she sobbed as tears ran down her face. Her head was spinning and her breathing was getting so rapid to the point where she felt like she was choking.

"Emma, look at me," Karrie directed, taking Emma firmly by the shoulders. "Look at me and breathe."

Emma felt Karrie pull her hands away from her face. She gazed at Karrie helplessly as she tried in vain to slow down her respirations. Her hands and lips were beginning to get tingly, and she felt extremely lightheaded. The sheets that were covering her fell off, leaving her entire torso exposed.

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