Endless Anti-Romantic

Chapter 23: The End

Chapter 23: The End

"Why are you crying?" Connor asks in an annoyed tone. "God stop! It's annoying as hell."

"Connor. I'm so sorry."

"Kay." I feel my heart break at that exact moment.

"I'm sorry for everything."

"Okay." Connor says taking another sip of beer. I pull the bottle away from him and throw it across the room. It broke, I heard it. I'm gonna have I clean it up but I don't care. I lean forward and grab the collar of Connor's shirt.

"Connor please listen to me! I'm sorry! And I love you." He scoffs and laughs lightly.

"Well yeah thanks for that." He pulls away and pulls Zoe into his lap. She hits him in the face.

"Don't fucking touch me." She gets up and walks upstairs.

"Connor."

"Naomi shut the fuck up."

"Connor please-"

"No Naomi! I'm sick of your shit! I've done so much shit to make you happy and help you. But of course I'm not good enough! I'm aware I'm a piece of shit."

"No you're not Connor."

"Shut up. Then why did you leave me in the first place. Marcus was always number one! Of course I was last on the list, you didn't give a fuck." My heart throbs. "You've never seen me as anything. Just a friend. Just someone you could manipulate." I sit beside him and grab his hand.

"Connor I love you." He pulls his hand away and I straddle his lap. "I love you Connor." He tries to push me away but instead I wrap my arms around his neck and press my forehead to his. "I'm hopelessly in love with you Connor." He mutters something and he forcefully grips the back of my head and pulls me in for a rough and wet kiss.

I can taste the liquor on his tongue. It's slightly unpleasant but it's Connor and I do love him with all my heart, as a friend and as someone I want to spend the rest of my life with.

~~~

Connor and I had sex yet again, on the couch. I have no clue where Zoe is. Connor kisses my neck one last time and sighs. "Goodbye Naomi." He gets off of me and starts getting dressed. I pull my shirt over my chest and slide on my skirt, not bothering with the underwear.

"Connor."

"I can't do this anymore Naomi."

"Connor stop." He walks upstairs into my room and pulls Zoe out of my bed.

"Zoe let's go. We're getting a hotel."

"Fuck you." She sighs and takes the keys from Connor's hand. She pushes past me and as Connor starts to walk with her I push him away.

"Connor please don't leave me. I love you."

"I can't Naomi. Not anymore." He can't love me anymore.

"Why not Connor please. Everything that we've been through."

"Marcus loves you. Love him back. I'm sick of this love triangle shit. You wouldn't pick a side so I did. You and Marcus." He tries to walk past me but I grab his arm and slam him against the wall.

"What the fuck Connor! Can't you see that I'm fighting for you?! I fucking love you Connor Arrington! I don't love Marcus, I don't want to love him! I was fucking stupid to even try to be with him because all along you were the one who is perfect for me."

"Naomi stop this."

"No Connor I won't." Connor grabs my waist and slams me against the wall. I gasp in pain and in surprise. "I won't stop Connor. Not until you agree with me."

"I'm not leaving Zoe." I feel more tears fall.

"She doesn't even fucking care about you Connor! Are you really too blind to see that?!"

"Just like you were too blind to see I loved you for so long? Yeah I guess I am." I grip the hem of his shirt.

"Connor please." I whimper. "I need you. I need my best friend. I need the person I love and want to be with." I see a few tears slip from his eyes. He kisses me slowly and pulls away.

"This is the end Naomi. I'm sorry." He leans in like he's going to kiss me again but he doesn't. He leant forward and walked away. As soon as I heard the door slam I collapse to the floor and cry as loudly as I possibly can. It's all ruined. I ruined it all. How could I have been so stupid? I've lost everyone. I stop crying and look up. Right at the window.

"Logan."

~~~

"LOGAN!" I bang on the door as hard as I can, tears pouring down my face. "LOGAN!" The door swings open and I see a sleepy Marcus.

"Naomi? What are-"

"LOGAN!" I yell as I run into the house.

"Naomi stop!" I burst through the door and see Logan on his bed. Arm bloody and scarred, he wore long sleeves when I saw him last. He sits up straight.

"Naomi." I run to him, collapse onto his bed and cry into his shoulder. "Naomi I'm getting blood on you-"

"I don't care Logan." He sighs and hugs me back.

"Logan? What's going on?"

"Later Marcus."

"No you'll tell me now."

"Marcus please just go! I can't deal with this now!" I yell finally removing my face from Logan's shoulder. Marcus' face seems to turn red. He walks out and slams the door shut.

"Naomi, what's wrong?"

"I've lost everyone. I've lost the person who meant the world to me." Logan sighs and pulls me onto his lap. "How do I make this hurt stop?"

"I have a few ideas." I pull away and look at his arm. "Not that one. That's nothing you should resort to."

"Then what?"

"Endorphins release stress and pain."

"So?"

"We're both feeling pretty shitty obviously. Let's say you and I release endorphins together."

"How?" I was never good at science. Logan lifts my chin and kisses me. My heart skips for a second. His kiss is different. Mechanical. Forced. I kiss back and that's when I realized something about myself as well as Logan.

I'm broken, hurt and vulnerable. Logan isn't going any farther than kissing. I like it. Both of our kisses are forced, anything to release the pain we feel. I'm bringing out my anger and sadness out in the kiss. Logan isn't doing anything of the sort.

Logan is empty. Numb. He's not doing this for himself. He's doing this to help me. He's uncomfortable with it from what I can tell, but he wants to help me. That heals him. Maybe...

Logan and I can heal each other...