Nightmares are a daily recurrence of mine there always the same.
They always involve her,
The things that she might cause me in the future if I hadn't gotten rid of her.
What would my life have come too.
Would she still try to get me involved with the drugs ,
Like in her blood stream .
Would she still push him on me like an arranged marriage.
I wake up sometimes in the middle of the night crying,
Even muffling a little scream so no one can hear the affliction she caused me.
My will to fight for things is slowly coming to an end.
I'm slowly decaying away with the wind ,
This time i think i might let it take me.
I've picked how I want to die.
Fast and painless
To get rid of the memories i have yet to make peace with.
The daily reminders and nightmares that hunt my dreams when I slowly fall to sleep.
The reminders of her in my dreams.
It's the emptiness and the feeling in your hands when you lock the door behind you ,
Running from the monster you call Mother.
The shakiness in your hands when you wake up,
The breath taken form you.
YOU ARE READING
the depths of my despair
PuisiYin & Yang . The good ,The bad. A balance between the two. This is the dark finding it's light through the depths of despair.
