Depression for me has never been an easy feeling to detect, sometimes it is so hard that i don't even know i am depressed until small things gather up and make me realize, i feel empty today.
Sometimes it is when i sleep 8 hours and still feel tired the next time.
Sometimes it is when i have spent the whole day sleeping and doing nothing else yet still, not being able to pull off the covers.
Sometimes it is when i don't watch the show or read a book which i have been anxiously waiting for awhile just because i don't feel like it.
Sometimes it is when i open my playlist, go through it, close it and go to sleep because nothing is matching my mood for weeks.
Sometimes it is when in the middle of watching a favorite show/anime/movie, i get tired of watching it even though it is still in its first 10 mins.
Sometimes it is when i have read over something 10 times and still doesn't get it even though i know the topic very well.
Sometimes it is when numerous mugs of coffee and tea are unable to take away my mental exhaustion.
Sometimes it is when i get tired of thinking something for more than 2 secs even though it is all infront of me.
Sometimes it is when i lay down and stare at wall without focusing on anything particular,hours and hours killing my precious time.
Sometimes it is when before sleeping i get a sudden unexplainable urge to cry out all my body water through my eyes.
Sometimes it is when i am eating my favorite food and 2 spoons in, i am too tired to put any more effort in eating.
Sometimes at night when i lay down and i think about it, i feel like there is a hollow space, instead of heart, which keep aching for something but doesn't know.
Sometimes it is there with me but no one can see it, not even me..
Note: I would like to clarify that this is what depression is to me. I have never being diagnosed with depressive disorder by an approved psychiatrist. Tbh i have never visited a psychiatrist for this either. Everyone can have depressive feelings time to time without having a depressive disorder.
On the side note: If you have been feeling depressed for more than 2 weeks or a month, you probably should visit a doctor for that. If a doctor gives you okay, lean on a trusting, understanding close person. If you don't have anyone, I am here for you. You don't have to fight with it alone. ❤
