My Terror Twin And I

Here we go again

"So uhhh good morning" smiled ben awkwardly

"Morning ben" I half smiled

I slipped into my stockings and tartan school skirt then slowly buttoned up my school top.

The silence that filled the air was horrible.

I sat on my chair in front of my large mirror and stared at my sleep deprived expression blanky.

It seems like the longer you stare at yourself the more distorted your face becomes.

I couldn't stare any longer so I looked down at the table.

The only sound in the room was ben getting dressed.

"You alright?" Ben asked, awkwardly rubbing the back of his tangled hair.

"Yeah" I lied

Ben propped himself on my table and looked at me awkwardly.

"Last night?" He questioned, looking down at his ripped skinny jeans.

"Yup" I mumbled as I fiddled with my tangle of red hair

"I'm so sorry" ben muttered, looking down in shame.

"What sorry for treating me like shit? Sorry for ruining my life? Sorry for doing.... Things with me? Or sorry for pretending to care? Who would care about me? You wouldn't. Clearly. You're the one that did this to me. After actually getting to know eachother we both fucking know you're going to go straight back to treating me like shit at school" I snapped. Tears began to well in my dark brown eyes.

"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry. Don't you think it hurt me to see all those cuts on your arms? Knowing I did that? It hurts to know you broke a person. It hurts to know I can't do anything about what I've done. It fucking sucks because I don't want to have to treat you like shit but I can't just see my mates and be like "oh hey guys be nice to Scarlett we got drunk and did shit and hung out and she's cool" you know? I can't do that. I wish I could but as hard as I could try It can't be that way!" Ben basically yelled, his face turning red as tears fell down his face.

He stood up and started pacing around my room

"Why ben? Why can't it be that way? No one has a fucking gun to your head. No one is forcing you to. E an asshole" I sneered.

"Look can we stop the fucking yelling please? It doesn't have to be this way. We have like three weeks left of school." Ben mumbled as he lowered his voice and messed with his hair.

"Well what's going to happen? I doubt we'll ever talk properly again.." I choked, the lump in my throat was pushing it's way up. I won't cry. I must not.

"I'll back off.. I'll tell the guys I'm focussing on finals. I still wanna see you. I'll sneak off at lunch and stuff to hang. I'll see you when I'm not with the guys after school." Ben pleaded

"That sounds a lot better than what I'm used to" I laughed.

"I never meant for it to get this far" ben whispered. Dropping into my bed

"Well why'd you start?" I half begged for an answer

"I liked you when I was like twelve or thirteen. The guys made fun of me for it so I thought why not be mean? That'll get the guys off my back. And it did. It also helped me be even more popular. I couldn't just throw it away and I seriously didn't mean to let it get this far" ben was choking back tears

"Ben.. I never knew" I whispered

"I'm glad" mumbled ben.

Suddenly the clock chimed