BLISS || An ASAP Rocky story||

17

Rakim

"Look, i dont want this to be a bad thing for us. This baby will be good for us. I know this isn't what you wanted, but i cannot let you go now. Not to sound like a bitch but, its true." I said to Isis. All she does is sit around the house sad and crying.

I felt so bad that i got her into this predicament. She stressed all day. She distanced herself from me and the boys besides Tyler and Frank.

She seems to confide in them and not me. I feel like a bitch saying it.

We argue about how she didn't want this for herself or her baby, how she wish she was home and i was ready to just let her go with all of her nagging.

"Rakim, all you think about is your damn self. Have you ever thought about why i always complaining about shit?" She yelled. She was in the bathroom bleaching and dying her hair considering it was no longer pink, but now red.

I thought she was beautiful. Since the doctor checked her out and gave her the prenatal pills, her skin has been healthy and glowing. That was was a month ago. Her stomach had grown a little since we found out and her attitudes had been coming ten times worse.

"Rakim, can i please just get ou-"

I cut her off right there but putting my hand up. Shes been trying to find a way to leave the mansion and move into a condo in the city. The last time a girl asked me to leave the mansion, it didn't end well.

I didn't want to hear her questions. But the idea of moving out the house wasn't that bad.

Moving into a condo had been on my mind since the Ferg problem.

3 hours later, Isis was finished dying her hair and cooked tacos for her, Jasper, Tyler and I. Carti was with Iggy for the last two weeks and comes some days to chill with us and to chill with Isis.

After i had ate, i decided to go roll up a blunt. I grabbed the weed out my closet that was in a shoe box. I grabbed the rest of the components and head to the rooftop.

I went over to the far corner where i saw bright red roses. They were stale, but kept their beautiful color and outer shell perfect.

They reminded me of Isis.

Im scared. Im scared to say i love her. I sound psychotic for even thinking of love. Im not capable of love. Im not capable of feeling the need and want of love. To hold on to someone and say that i want to spend the rest of my life saying that i love Isis.

Im scared to love again.

This weed began to make me think about things that i hate to think about.

I flicked the ashes off my blunt and off the ledge that i was sitting on. My body heat and the weed made my head spin.

I started to chuckle, which turned into giggling, and now I'm having laughing to myself on a roof in the middle of west bubba fuck in Canada surrounded by flowers.

What kind of gay shit am i on?

Thoughts of love is scary. I killed the last person i said loved.

I remember the last time my mother said I love you. I took a drag of the weed and started to reminisce. Her bright brown/hazel eyes, larger than life smile, brown sugar skin and wild curly hair made me smile. That ms when i was 4.

She was beautiful, man. Meeting someone and then them telling you "I love You" can really change you until i saw her and ole dude.

He took my mother and made her a monster.

I sighed and turned and got off the building top. I no longer wanted to be dangling off the top of a roof thinking about love.

Love can get you hurt or killed.

I slowly walked over to the Sunflowers that Tyler planted. The bright yellow leaves made the sunset look a peasant to the color.

I twirled the blunt in my hand and stared to play with my braids. Weed was my outlet through all the stupid shit in my life and now Isis.

No one was stopping that.

Ferg

"Yo! We should just take her from the basement! Me knowing Rakim bitch ass, he probably was a pussy and gave Isis Jesse's old room." I tried to reason with him.

His smug look on his face showed me that  the idea i thought was good was a dumb one.

He climbed off the bed that he once sat comfortable in and began to walk out the room door, following him pursuit.

We walked down a bunch if stairs in the large building that was once a tax return building until it was closed down. My boss took it and turned it into his house, trap house, and torture chamber. He was into that weird shit.

He went into the large closet that sat in the far right corner of the basement. He pulled out guns, gas bombs, gas masks and knives.

"The fuck you thought this was? We was just going to sneak in without having a little fun? Ha! You lucky i dont kill your stupid ass where you stand." He spat as he walked past me with a distasteful look.

"Look, i want his girl and you want revenge. You get Rocky and i get Isis."

His ears perked up at the sound of her name and he started to walk up to me with the devilish look in his eyes.

"Im getting both."