Royals watch Text-To-Speech.

Royals watch Text-To-Speech. Part 9

Arise, my Comrades!

After the group had finally stop itching to the point of nearly going bald, they all settled down to watch another ep of Text to Speech.

"Let's get this over with," Luna stated as she pressed play after snatching the remote.

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EPISODE 7

[The Emperor sitting on his golden throne as always]

Emperor: I MEAN, EVER SINCE I GOT THIS TEXT TO SPEECH DEVICE, I'VE NOT SEEN ANYONE OTHER THAN MY CENTURION, SOME TECHPRIESTS, THAT AWFUL FUCKING DREADKNIGHT THING, AND YOU. WHERE ARE THE REST OF THE CUSTODES? DID THEY ALL DIE OFF OR SOMETHING? ARE YOU THE ONLY ONE LEFT?

"That would be bad," Celestia muttered. If the best of Terra's warriors were gone then the Emperor was vulnerable to the powers of chaos.

Luna nodded "It would be as if We were without the Royal and Lunar guards"

Custodian: [in a sad voice as he remembers] After we witnessed you at the brink of death, your body being sat upon the golden throne, all the custodes went into a collective depression. We all decided to stop fighting outside the planet's borders. We've never left this Palace since, always guarding your sacred vessel.

"I feel kind of bad for them," Luna said in a sad tone. "Watching their leader fall in battle just to be hooked up to a machine like that would break many ponies spirits."

"I don't think I could handle feeling all those hearts break from that," Cadance said with a sad nod.

"I don't think I could handle seeing Celestia or any of you like that," Twilight muttered as she held back a shiver from going down her spine from the thought.

'They should have gotten over it,' Sunset thought. Not daring to voice her opinion out loud. She wasn't trying to be callous but they should of at least have most of the Custodians go out and help in the fight against the empire of man's enemies. It's more than likely what the Emperor would have wanted, she knew it's what she would of wanted.

Emperor: WHAT A BUNCH OF PUSSIES YOU ARE. I CAN MANAGE MYSELF, Y'KNOW. I'M NOT A REGULAR ASS FUCKING CORPSE.

'Agreed,' Sunset thought with a nod of approval. Though she wondered why she was annoyed like the Emperor was with how he was treated like he was defenseless.

"Hey, it's not like they have experience dealing with a cranky god skeleton that loved gold," Luna defended the Custodian.

Custodian: Of course not my lord! [nervous] eh he he he . . .

Emperor: ALSO, THAT STILL DOESN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION. WHERE ARE THE REST OF THE CUSTODES?

"You might want to answer him," Cadance warned. "He looks like he's going to smack you around in the palace."

Custodian: The rest are currently guarding the palace, my Lord

Emperor: WELL. IN THAT CASE, TELL THEM TO GO OUT AND BE USEFUL INSTEAD. I DIDN'T GIVE THEM THE BEST WARGEAR IN THE IMPERIUM FOR NOTHING.

"Damn straight," Sunset snarked. "What a waste of good weapons."

"They were mourning the loss of their leader," Twilight shot back.

"In the middle of a war?" Sunset shot back even harder and even got in the princess of friendships face.

"You two calm down," Celestia said in a mother like tone as she pulled the two apart.