For Him (Tracob)

Troye's pov

We have the insemination appointment on Tuesday. It goes about as well as would be expected. Really, nothing much happens. Charlie is there, obviously. Jacob has to be there, to provide the necessary, um, fluids. They take Charlie into a room, do the little... procedure, I guess you would call it, and then she comes back out looking no different. The whole thing takes maybe half and hour, wait time included. Really, I didn't even have to be there, but I wanted to. We set an appointment to return in two weeks and that's when we'll find out if it worked. If we have a baby on the way. Charlie tells us it's yet to fail on her, but it does seem real, and I don't want to get my hopes up. It's Friday morning. The sun is out. The LA hustle and bustle is alive and thriving. The smell of eggs and toast drifts from the kitchen where Jacob is preparing breakfast. I'm sitting outside, curled in a wicker lounge chair. Today is the day. The day we find out of we're parents-to-be, or if we have more attempts, more hoping, more waiting ahead of us. I'm not sure what scares me more. The thought that it might not have worked - or the thought that it did.

The screen door slides open, and Jacob comes out, two plates of eggs and toast balanced in his hands, and a couple of forks and napkins in between his teeth. He hands me one.

"Breakfast, Tok?" He offers, and I nod, accepting the plate. He settles down beside me and we eat in silence for awhile.

"Are you ready?" He asks me, setting down his fork. "To find out?"

I lean onto his shoulder. His body is warm and solid in a comforting way. "This has been the longest two weeks of my life." I tell him. "But I'm nervous."

Jacobs fingers thread through my hair. "I know, Tro. Me too."

He doesn't offer any reassurance, but the way he says it, it's almost like he's telling me it's okay. I'm allowed to be nervous.

We dawdle on the porch for awhile, until it's time to leave in order to beat the LA traffic. We manage to snag parking very near the doctor's office and head inside with only a couple minutes to spare. Charlie is sitting in the waiting room, and when she sees us she stands up, looking genuinely excited.

"Hi, you're right on time, look at you!" Are you ready for this? Psyched? Nervous? Might puke? How do you feel?"

"All of the above," I tell her. "But more importantly, how do you feel?"

She quirks her lips into a smile. "I guess we'll have to wait and find out, huh?"

"Oh, it's like that I see. You've got me. We'll wait."

I sort of vibe with the easy banter that Charlie and I already have. It's comfortable and entertaining. Jacob prods me to get me attention when the doctor comes out and beckons us back. He and I get to wait in the generic, sterile office, while Charlie is led off to take her test in a different room. I pace the room. Each minute drags on. Jacob sits and holds my hand as I walk the same short line over and over again, never straying far enough that his hand can't reach mine. Finally - finally - the door opens and the doctor comes back it, Charlie in tow. Jacob and I look up sharply, searching their faces for any sort of clue about the results, but they're both poker straight.

"Well?" Jacob asks.

Charlie looks at him, then at me, then at him again. Then she flips the hem of her shirt up just far enough that a sticky note can be seen taped to her flat stomach. She breaks into a huge grin.

Expected 10/13/21

Baby Bixenman.

I nearly shriek, snatching the note right off of her and gripping Jacob's arm so hard it hurts me. I can't form words, but Jacob looks up, incredulous.

"Oh my God, are you serious? It worked? You're really-"

Charlie and the doctor both nod. Jacob covers his mouth with his hand. I feel a little light headed. Nervous and shocked and thrilled all at once. The doctor allows us several minutes to chill out enough to pencil in yet another appointment, this one in two more weeks, for the first official check up, and then we're free to go. I can't resist giving Charlie a quick hug, which she returns sweetly, and then Jacob and I leave. I try to keep it together until we're away from prying eyes, but as soon as we reach the second level of the secluded parking complex, I can't keep composed any longer, and I burst into tears. They're tears of elation, Jacob knows this as much as I do, and he lets me wrap my arms around his neck and sob into his shoulder.

"Baby Bixenman," I whimper tearfully, as he rubs my back. "I- holy shit, Jacob. This is real. We have a baby coming. We're going to be parents."

"I know, Troye. I know." He whispers, laughing shakily, maybe close to tears as well. "This is it, Tro. How long have we been waiting for this?"

"So long," I sniffle. "Too long."

He squeezes me tight. "Nine months. Less than nine months to be completely ready to bring a baby home. That's fucking wild."

I wipe my eyes. "Do you think we can pull it off?"

He laughs. "I think we have to, now. But I think we can. We're the best team." He hugs me again, so tight I can hardly breathe. "This doesn't feel real. I love you so much."

I melt in his group. In that moment I realize there's no one else in the world I'd want to start this life with besides Jacob. No one else loves so fully, or treats me so gently, or acts so thoughtfully, or sees me the way he does. I love him. I fucking love him so much I can't breathe. Or maybe that's the fact that he's inadvertently crushing my ribcage in his embrace. I don't care. I love him so much. I love him so much.