No Regrets

Chapter Twenty Three - Girls Day

KATIE'S POV

  Today is not a great day for Mollie, which means it has not been a great day for my family. Mollie has been extremely cranky lately, she had a huge crying-fit early this morning before the sun had even begun to rise. Dominick ended up rolling her crib out into the hallway and went back his room to sleep. He went as far as to even lock his bedroom door. Dad ended up getting up and taking Mollie downstairs to get her calmed down. My parent think she simply is very fussy from teething and wants everyone else to know she's uncomfortable. Apparently, I acted similarly when I was a baby.

   Dad and Dominick both went out to see a movie this afternoon. Mom has been working in her home-office all morning; which means that it's more one-on-one  time with my niece. Watching Mollie has begun getting a bit harder and harder the older she gets. She used to be quite easy to watch, she used to be really laid back. Now, especially with her cutting teeth and being able to roll around, she is quite the handful. She cries if she is scared, hungry, sad, wet, cold, angry, over stimulated, over tired, and several more things. Lately, she has begun to refuse my comfort when I initially try to give it to her. Mom has her office door closed which means I can't bring Mollie in there to be comforted by her grandmother.

   Mollie has finished eating her lunch and is currently her usual happy self. I have Mollie do a little tummy-time. She's on the edge of crawling, but doesn't completely understand she has to move her arms and legs at the same time.

   When Mollie starts to get bored, I pick her up and carry her to Mom's office door. I knock softly on the door.

   "Come in." Mom says in a gentle voice. I'm glad she's not too stressed out with work. She has had a lot on to do lately and has been a bit stressed out. She's forbidden to share what happens in her cases for legal and moral reasons; but Dominick told me that she's been assigned a huge case. There is a lot at stake with this case, if she loses. She could lose a lot of clients or possibly her place in the practice.

   I open the door just as Mom shuts her laptop and closes the folder sitting on her desk. "Let's grab something to eat out." she says before I can even explain my reasoning for knocking. I was simply going to ask about taking Mollie out on a stroll in the park; but eating out with Mom is even better.

"Sure, let me get dressed." I say handing Mollie to Mom.

"You can invite your boyfriend to join us." Mom says.

"He's not my boyfriend. He's my project partner." I say. My time is sharp and defensive; which does not help in making me sound convincing. Mom laughs and swears she is only messing with me.

"Never bring a boy over Mollie. You'll never hear the end of it from your grandma." I say to my niece before waking out of the room.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  "Mom, seriously he's just my project partner." I say before taking a bite of bread. Mom brought up Sawyer for the fourth time since we sat down at the table, which was only ten minutes ago. Mom will make a small comment that will imply Sawyer and I are indeed closer than I'm letting on.

   I'm almost thirteen and I've never had a boyfriend. I haven't ever even had a small middle-school romance with a boy. I have no experience with passing notes, kicking each other's feet, giving each other a hard time, or sitting next to each at lunch. I am sure I've had one boy in a class develop a crush on me; but i've never been told by anyone that I'm their crush.

"Mom, can we change the subject?" I plead.

"Of course, we can talk about whatever you want." Mom says reaching across the table to take my hand into hers. She gives my hand a little loving squeeze and smiles at me. "I love you." She says.

   I smile at her as I think about what she had said mere months ago. Anything I want? I think to myself. There are many questions I've always wanted to ask my parents, many things I wanted to say; but never found the bravery or be right moment. This could be the moment I've been waiting for. I open my mouth to carefully start building towards one of my lost burning questions when words come pouring out of my mouth. "I'm your biological daughter, right?"

   Mom lets go of my hand and pulls her hands back. She furrows her eyebrows in concern. "Why would you ask that?" she asks.

   Two years ago, I was searching in the attic for something and instead of finding what I was searching for, I came across a small box. I opened the box out of simple curiosity, I expected to find old toys or clothes. Items that my parents have saved from Dominick and I to pass down or are keeping for sentimental reasons. Instead I found tons of baby pictures; which I wasn't too surprised about since parents have ensured Dominick and I's lives have been well documented through photos and videos.

   However, when I took a look at the photos inside, I couldn't make sense of them. There were several photos of a newborn baby girl. Obviously, I assumed the photos were of me after I'd been born; however, I noticed in one the photos, listed on a piece of paper attached to the outside of the crib was a birthdate that was years before my own. I quickly began going through the photos scanning through them until I could find the mentioning of a name; and I eventually found it. Written on the back of one of the photos was the name: Mary Elizabeth Benji.

   I have no female relative on my father's side named Mary Elizabeth, not a single relative. I instantly began searching the attic for the box that contained photographs of me as a newborn; and I couldn't find a single box that contained a single baby photo of me before I was three months old.

   For the past two years, I have been unable to shake the questions from my mind. I haven't been able to locate or uncover any information about who Mary Elizabeth Benji is or was. I had begun to let the matter go, allow for those questions to go unanswered; but when I looked at myself in the mirror at the jewelry store, gasoline was added to my burning questions. 

  "Listen, Katie." Mom says taking my hands into hers. She looks into my eyes. "You are my daughter. You're your father's daughter. You're Dominick's sister. And we love you." Mom says. "Do you understand me?" she asks.

That isn't the answer I was looking for. I say in my head.

"Do you understand me." Mom repeats, her voice is stern and serious.

"Yes." I say. "I understand you." I add.

   I repeat and ponder her words inside my head for the rest of our lunch. Even as the conversation topic changes, I can't stop thinking about the words. I can't shake the uneasy feeling I feel. I can't shake the feeling that I am at the tip of everything changing; and I can't figure out exactly why.

*** AUTHOR'S NOTE ***

  Suprised? No? Yes?

I've been making little hints that Katie might be unsure about her place in the family. I'm not sure if anyone noticed.

What do you think the answer is? Type your theory (if you have one) down below. I'd love to read what you're thoughts are.

We're catching up with the PROLOGUE!

THANK YOU FOR READING! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED!

VOTE, COMMENT, FOLLOW, do whatever you want.