Short Little Shorties 2

12 AM Diary #1101

That Lost Inspiration

Keep your senses alert, an inspiration is just round the corner.

Or,

For the curious seeker, there's always a bulb lit.

Yes, these lines were written by me once.

Honestly, that one line says it all, doesn't it?

They were written by me. Though just some months ago, that golden phase of writing seems so far-fetched and distant at the moment. A memory trapped in the past. Or rather, a dream waiting to be forgotten.

And, it's not like I haven't tried.

Every day I sit, holding a pen, gliding it on paper. But that's all it ever does. It just glides. That union of pen and paper doesn't churn up words anymore.

If you ask me, it's kind of okay in a way, just like an inevitable phase.

After all, what else can you expect when an artist has lost all his inspiration!

Yes, that's exactly what has happened.

Not one, not two, I have lost all my inspiration.

Some artists get inspired by love, some by a breakup. Nature brings out the best of someone while the others are driven by a tea cup.

All these things help me too, no doubt. But they've never been the ones to bring out the best in me.

My biggest inspiration has always been my friends. My pen pals, my readers, my partners in crime, those are the ones who brought the words out of me.

There was a time when they used to elegantly add their own lines to mine.
There was a time when we used to sit through midnight and rhyme.

They read, they praised, they critiqued, they loved. They were the ones who soared me up in the sky. No, they weren't just some readers or pen pals or friends to me. They were my biggest inspiration.

And today, they've all moved away.

All are busy fighting their own battles of life.

And trust me, I'd be the happiest one out there to see them emerge victorious. But, it just feels a little sad not to share my thoughts with them anymore.

Being in the online world, we had never shared the physical space. We were always here in the virtual world, united by technology. And today when their presence has dwindled, there's just a big void out there for me.

And you know what's the worst part, I can't do anything about it.

I know most of those friends are going to read this. And to all of them, I'd just like to say this one thing.

This is not for you. This is for me!

They say that acceptance is the first step towards solving a problem. And today, that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm finally accepting the reason why I'm going through this writer's block. Let's see where this takes me in my quest for solution.

Because when you look at it, people moving away is just one part of the problem. Other is me, as an artist, staying rooted at the exact same spot.

I guess the main part of problem is me failing to find fresh source of inspiration.

And that's why I said before, this is not for them, this is for me.

It's good to introspect, it's good to clear out thoughts. But in the end, it'd mean nothing if we don't sort ourselves out.

And from today, the artist in me wishes to sort himself out.

Words will again be my friends. Yes, I believe in it.

And I'll let this belief by my silver lining in the ongoing storm.