"how did you find out?"
"find out what?" i ask, looking up from the ground.
"that you had the gift™"
"uhh what do you mean?"
"how did you find out you had it?"
"oh. i really dont know."
"wow"
"by the way"
"yeah"
"its 9 pm you know what that means"
"oh boy mayonnaise!" he shouts excitedly, like a small child. i walk over to the fridge in our 17 bedroom apartment and pull out the limited edition jar of mayonnaise i bought.
"here ya go"
"thanks!!!!!!!!!" he smiles. "hey by the way what happened to our roommates?"
"huh?"
"youre here, im here, edward is out experiencing life - so i mean at the bar getting wasted - where are the others"
"oh kaitlyn probably ran away for a little bit"
"why?"
"either to escape me calling her baby girl all the time or her crippling depression."
"factssssssssSSSSSSssSzzsZSZSSZSZssssSSzSzsZszzZZzzZsssssss"
"i wouldnt be surprised if they find her dead in a ditch from suiciding"
"nah shes too scared"
"true. what a coward, jesus."
"you think she'll come back soon?"
"yeah"
"okay then what about the other one"
"hes over there" i point to my left. eric looks. theres a glass cage with a leopard gecko in it.
"no, idiot, i dont mean jimothy. although hes one of my favourite roommates."
"whos your least favourite roommate"
"probably kaitlyn"
"why"
"shes too.......... weird. shes not like other people and that kind of freaks me out."
"oh."
"yeah, like who even has a job anymore? and stable finances? pays rent properly? does taxes? actually takes care of jimothy? bought jimothy and his home? cooks food for everyone? lives life properly? doesnt have any weird superpower"
"youre right thats kind of strange"
"anyways where is our other roommate?"
"oh, he's probably-"
suddenly the door bursts open and a tall figure stands there
"oh there he is" eric shakes his head. "where the [heck] were you"
"i was busy" he says in a voice so deep that the entire room shakes, and i can hear one of the kitchen cabinets open and all of the glass cups vibrate and fall on the floor, breaking.
"god damnit keith why would you do that again"
"im sorry colon parentheses we'll have to get someone to buy more"
"but who?" eric asks, tapping his chin with his index finger
"kaitlyn?" we all say at the same time
"i mean, shes the only one with money"
"yeah were all broke" i laugh
"what are you guys talking about" a voice comes from the door. its edward.
"oh just mr my voice is so deep every time i talk we need to buy new china"
"hey its not that deep ok"
we hear a crash from the kitchen.
"there go the plates" edward sighs, pulling out his EYE FOWN SEHVIN (flexing)
.................
YOU ARE READING
transcending
Paranormaltranscending takes two people to perform. yet there is only one person in the entire universe who can transcend. all my life ive thought i was weird or different, having strange thoughts, but it turns out that i have the gift™. i am the only person...
