Daughter of the Devil | living in hell

seventeen♣️

Jo Yumi's view
Walking down these stairs it feels like going into heaven. I am not thinking of anything but this moment. How could I forget this beautiful feeling of being outside, this fresh air and this calm atmosphere.

I am like a prisoner going outside of the jail.
It is not that my father forces me to work or stay there to practice but I do it myself to be honest. He has this high standards of perfection and I want to be good enough.

It is so hard to keep up with alle these beautiful and talented idols. I am a good dancer but there are better ones and they are beautiful some of them even handle to go to school while being an idol.

I look at Hanbin and he is almost scanning the park as if he's never gonna see it again. Actually I wanted to go out today for only a couple of minutes but walking with him for hours is fine too. I learned more about him and know that he is an amazing person.

He disturbs my thoughts and says „ Why are you never leaving the practice room? I mean you have all the money and everything but you are still working so hard."

Not a hard question for me. What am I gonna do with that money to be honest I don't have any real friends to just fly around the world and where would I even go. Working keeps me away from thinking about things like my mom or my dad. So why not.

I look at him and it kinda hurts me „ Feeling the pain while I am dancing is better than feeling the pain of loneliness. That's probably the reason." Why did I even say that? Couldn't
I just shut up.

He looks at me straight in the eyes now
„ I know this is nothing I could change because the only person who can do that is you.
But I want to say something the world can be good if you try to see it from another perspective.
We only see it from the bad side you have the opportunity to go outside from the industry and be free"

I just smile sadly looking into the sky. It is so dark and it's so beautiful to look at.

„I know but this is just how I live and i don't know if it ever will change" saying this I know that there is no hope at all for me but I went outside this is a big step actually. Or is it something that I wanted to do before everything ends?

„ It is late I think we should go back because my dad will worry if I am not working." I say walking up the stairs. Hanbin follows me and we talk about their upcoming comeback the song will be called „I'm okay".

Infront of the company
Hanbin looks at me and says „ It was a great day today thanks for talking with me and if
I talked too much nonsense I apologize."

„Oh no it was fine. It has been such a long time for me that I was outside so I am grateful for you to come with me and show me this beautiful places." I say.

We say our goodbyes and soon after that I rush inside and go to my room. It is so weird knowing that I Jo Yumi was outside and didn't do anything. I didn't work I didn't practice or wrote songs I was just outside. Wow.

I don't know why I had the feeling to go outside. I don't have the feeling of „ Oh it was amazing today I want to do that again" but the feeling of „ This is one thing I did now I can be free" and to be honest this doesn't feel right.

These past weeks or days I feel very lazy, very sad and lonely. I am thinking of my mom who is not here with me and of my dad who hates me and treats me like a robot without feelings. I don't wanna do that anymore I wanna be free.

Would it be better if I wasn't in this world anymore. Would someone even care or think about me? My life is such a waste I think of guys that I could never have. What for. They will probably date some idol who is better than me and more beautiful.

I mean the girls here are really pretty, they can sing, they can dance and they are confident. They actually know how to attract someone but what about me? I don't know shit about these things no one cares about me and would never even dare to fall in love with me.

Most people are thinking like that „ This is the daughter of Lee Soo Man we shouldn't be friends with her because her father could do something bad to us if we don't wanna be friends anymore"

It is so hard to keep up this perfect role, the daughter of him who can do everything without problems. I don't have time for mistakes. Why is it so hard to have a normal life?

I wanted to go sleeping but my phone is ringing so I just pick it up „ hey who is this?" I say. The one on the phone doesn't talk back so I ask this person again „Helloo who is thiss?" and after saying that I hear someone saying „ Yumi are you there?"

And I feel myself getting week because of this voice. This voice I would recognize it everywhere but I never imagined that I would hear it again. I feel tingles all over my body almost like throwing up.

„Mom...?" I say and it feels wrong because
I never said that after she left. Why would she call me I thought that she was dead or something.

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Hey guys another chapter is up so I hope you enjoy reading it give me some feedback thanks I love all of you💕