The Eye of a Hurricane

Isabel

I don't think Uncle Lin knew how much I was struggling and I wasn't going to tell him.  He dropped us off at school the next day and I slipped away from my locker as usual.  Instead of heading to class, I stepped out a side door, back out into the city.  I stood outside the door for a few minutes, just breathing in and out deeply.  I couldn't spend yet another day at school.  Mrs. Thompson knew I was a total moron now.  I'd stayed for tutoring the other day and I couldn't understand anything she was trying to teach me.  She was really nice about it, but now she knew.  I was stupid.

After I'd worked up the guts, I ducked away and walked down the street.  I found a little coffee shop, ordered something sugary, and holed up in the corner with my book.  I spent a peaceful morning lost in my book.  The book was just reaching a climax when a police officer walked up to me.

"Excuse me," he said, his voice stern.  I looked up at the man, who towered over me.  He must have been at least 6'4".  "You don't happen to be Isabel Miranda do you?"

"Uhhh...maybe?"

"Your school reported you truant," he said.  I looked at his belt and saw his handcuffs jingling.  I had done something really bad.  Was he going to arrest me?  "Your uncle is out looking for you.  Come with me."

I gulped and marked my page, then slipped it into my backpack.  I followed the man out the door and trailed behind him as we walked a couple blocks to my school.  He was on his radio, reporting that I'd been located.  I hadn't thought that the school would report me missing and send the police to look for me.

We entered the school building and Uncle Lin was standing in the office with the principal.  As I approached, I was afraid he might slap me, but instead he pulled me into a hug.  He was shaking.

"Oh thank God, Isabel," he said, hugging me tightly.  I didn't really hug him back.  Honestly, I was a little bewildered. 

"I'm glad you're safe," the principal said, letting out a sigh.  "But Isabel, you can't just take off like this.  We're responsible for your safety while you're here at school.  The phone call I had to make to your uncle to say you were missing was the worst phone call I've ever had to make."

"Sorry," I mumbled, looking at my shoes.

"Let's go to my office and talk," she said, gesturing towards her office.  I followed her silently, along with Uncle Lin.  She closed the door and we all sat down.  I looked down, feeling horrible.  I'd worried everyone.

"So, Isabel," the principal began.  "I'm guessing you've been having a hard time so far, since you skipped school.  Can I ask what's upsetting you?"

I shrugged and picked at my cuticles. 

"Your dad called from Puerto Rico last night," Uncle Lin said, looking at me.  "Did that upset you?  Make you homesick?"

"A little," I admitted.  I didn't like being bombarded by adults like this.  If they thought I was going to spill, they were sorely mistaken.

"Isabel, we want you to be happy at school," the principal said.  "But it's not going to happen instantly.  It's going to take some time.  Have you thought about signing up for any extracurricular activities?"

"I've been waiting to bring that up with her, but maybe now's the time," Uncle Lin said.  "Maybe being in a group, you could get to know the other kids a bit more."

"I don't know," I mumbled.

"What are your interests?" the principal asked me.

"Reading," I told her.

"We do have a book club after school Wednesdays," she said.  "The librarian leads it.  Would you be interested in trying that?"

I shrugged, but that sounded wonderful.  I loved hanging out with librarians.

"I think that sounds good," Uncle Lin answered for me.  "Let's have you try that next week okay?"

I nodded, biting my lip.  The principal looked at the clock.  "I'll leave it up to you two.  Isabel seems kind of upset, so she can either go home or stay at school.  Mr. Miranda?"

He looked at me and I hung my head.  He was probably so disappointed in me.  But, he wasn't yelling at me.  Sometimes he was hard to read.

"Maybe we should go home for the day," he said, patting my leg.  "We could use the time to catch up on her math.  She's gotten behind."

"That sounds like a great idea," the principal agreed, standing up.  "Isabel, I'll see you back again tomorrow for a full day.  I nodded as Uncle Lin and I both stood up.  I followed him out wordlessly and he signed me out.  We rode the subway home and I didn't want to look at him.  Usually, my dad would just start yelling at me.  I didn't understand why he was so quiet.

We arrived home and he closed to door.  "Go sit on the couch, please."

I sighed and sat down.  My eyes immediately welled up with tears.  Now he was going to let me have it.  I braced for the yelling.  Instead, I heard his footsteps approach, quiet.  I sensed him sit on the coffee table in front of me.

"Sweetheart, why are you crying?" he asked so gently.

"Because you're mad at me," I sobbed, trying not to lose it.  I felt his fingers brush mine and he linked them with mine.

"I'm not mad at you," he said softly.  "I was worried.  I was scared.  I hate that you're feeling this way."

I choked on a sob a little bit and he stroked my hand.  Why was he being so nice?  I'd done something horrible.

"I wish you'd let me help you," he said.  "That you'd talk to me.  I don't know what you're feeling, but I'm pretty sure you're struggling.  Am I right?"

I nodded and rubbed at my eyes. 

"You're trying to carry this burden on your own," he said.  "You don't have to.  I'm here for you, and Pippa's here for you as well.  Can you start talking to us?"

"I'll try," I said, my voice unsteady.  Lin moved from the coffee table to sit next to me.  I felt him pull my head towards his chest and he just held me, stroking my hair.

"You're a great kid," he told me, but I didn't believe him.  "And I want you to be happy."

He held me for a long time, and I had to admit it felt good.  Dad wasn't very affectionate.  He was never one to cuddle with us or hug for more than a few moments.  I began to sit up and Uncle Lin kissed me on the head.

"Why don't you go relax in your room for a while," he suggested, giving me a small smile.  "I'll come get you for lunch."

I nodded and stood up, then paused.  I turned back and wrapped my arms around his neck.  He hugged me back and I felt my eyes well up with tears again. 

"I'm sorry I scared you," I told him tearfully.

"It's okay," he told me.  "It's over.  Go lay down."

I nodded and slipped away to my room.  I climbed the bunk bed and laid down on my tummy.  A few minutes later I felt myself drift off, dreaming of Puerto Rico.