The Letter Of My Story (One Direction)

Loneliness Bites Back

Chapter 20

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'Watcha doin' there Nat?' I peered over my apple strudel. Natalie was really into what she was doing. Smiling knowingly, she held up a piece of paper with a colored pencil in her hand. 'Is that me and you?' I pointed at the two purple skinned figures. She nodded spontaneously. It was to my disappointment that she hadn't spoken a word.

It has been quite lonely at my place. John didn't show up ever since that incident when I punched the girl in her face. Apparently, that went viral on the news, well people were afraid of me. They think I'm some kind of sociopath. I've been used to Niall's presence here but I guess that one's my fault. Need I say more about Silena? I may or may not have started the fight, either way I was the one who took the first in apologizing, that didn't make me weak. But I had learnt that you don't want to get on her bad side. It was the ugly truth. If she hated you, she'll stubbornly keep it that way. But what can I say? I still miss her with all my heart.

So I really appreciated Natalie being here with me. It's amazing what a child can do to enlighten you. I gazed at her, you wouldn't have known that just two days ago, she'd been kidnapped and brought all the way here from Texas. She was a fighter.

I frowned as I realised it was getting hard for me to breathe. I gasped, trying to breathe through my nose then my mouth. Panic rose and I fell onto the ground, fighting for air. Taking deep breaths, the air finally rushed into my lungs. Honestly, why do I still live?

When evening came, the thought occurred to me how it was going to be difficult to say goodbye to the kid. Natalie had comforted me so much. And I was going to miss her adorableness. I opened the door and a young girl, roughly the age of seven, rushed towards Natalie and tried to pick her up.

'Nat Nat! Good girl!' The girl hugged Natalie. I noticed that Natalie started crying silently, hugging tightly.

'That's your other cousin, Chloe.' My mum chuckled, watching those too. 'They don't usually act very sisterly, but look at them. Her parents can't bear to think if she wasn't the right one, so they stayed behind.'

'Can Natalie talk?' That question blurted out of my mouth. Chloe was excitedly whispering things in her sister's ear and Natalie led her to the slide. Chloe squealed and they both disappeared up the spiral tube.

'Of course. She's just more shy compared to her sister. Give her time.' My mum said.

'Unfortunately my time is already up.' I heaved a sigh. Natalie was the pearl in a rose. My only option was to kidnap and keep her all to myself.

'It's always hard to let go. Here.' She handed me a stainless steel container. It felt warm to the touch. 'It's Ginseng chicken soup. It'll make you feel better. Look at you, you're as pale as the moon.'

'Mum, I'm fine.' I took the container from her. 'Thanks.' It's always hard to let go, those words echoed in my head. I felt two arms slipping around my waist. I looked down and saw Natalie smiling back at me. She gestured me to move closer towars her and so I bent down. She fixed my lips into a smile and grinned back at me. I kissed her forehead and bid them goodbye. Who knows, it could've been the last time I would ever see them.

I drank the clear-based Asian style broth. The liquid had a hint of bitterness, yet it was satisfying, kinda like life itself, bittersweet. My advice, live life like you're dying, although in my case, I would've like to rephrase it a bit. Anyways, it's always ok to act like a kid, to feel young, wild and free again. Take Louis for instance, he's doing a great job. But we've gotta keep in mind of our priorities.

I changed into a black spaghetti strap leotard and entered my dance studio, a spacious room with wooden floorings and walls covered with mirrors. I connected my iPod to the speaker and Harry's voice filled the room. It was one of my favourite songs, Same Mistake, the song that so accurately describes human behavior in life. I slipped on my pointe shoes and secured the silk ribbons.

I stood up and checked myself. Mum was right, I was pale. Now the black made an even bigger contrast to my skin. I let the music take control of my movements but I couldn't seem to dance as I stumbled and wavered side to side, back and forth. I couldn't feel my balance. I smashed the mirror with my knuckles and sunk to the floor as the glass pane shatters.

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