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Hoping You Won't

I don't want to be like this
Doubting my every move
Every second worrying
Knowing you could do better
Wishing you could see
Hoping you won't

I don't want you to see
Me holding back my tears
Wanting to just fall asleep
Knowing that I can't
You think you understand
You think you know
But you really don't

I will tell you that I'm fine
Every single day, every night
I will always be fine
Heart sinking to my toes
Thoughts clouded by the storms
Knowing that I failed
Wishing you would leave
Hoping you won't

You see through my lies
But you don't see through me
Your words make me better
Even if only for a second
Even still I wish you knew
Hoping you don't