Laws of Attraction; MYG/JJK

I Need To Write This

Hey guys, 

I feel like I need to write this little side-note before I can continue with this story. I don't blame you if you skip over this Author's Note but I feel like I have to get this off my chest before I can continue and I would appreciate if you gave it a quick read.

This story is one of my absolute favourites, I love writing it because certain aspects of it are so close to my heart. 

A lot of my stories come from a very personal place. Sometimes it's just a small part of the story, a hobby of one of my characters or particular things they like - white tulips for example. 

Other times, the characters themselves come from personal places or people who are close to me. 

In this story, the character of Y/N's Mother takes inspiration from my real-life Grandmother. 

My Grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2010 and it really is the cruelest of diseases. 

At first, it's just the little things whether that be getting on a bus and forgetting which stop is yours or getting the names of your various grandchildren muddled up more frequently. For all that stage is hard, it's bearable because the person that you still know and love is still there. 

Little by little, that person starts to lose more and more of themselves. They start forgetting to feed themselves, they start wandering the streets late at night, they start to forget those around them. 

It's not easy to make the choice of having to place a loved member of your family into long-term care. But sometimes, it is the only thing that you can do. 

Alzheimer's never gets any easier. 

As a family member, it makes you feel like a horrible person. It makes you feel like a horrible person because sometimes you just wish that this person you love would slip away because their quality of life is just cruel, unimaginable. 

Sometimes I would catch glimpses of her old self. They were rare and they were few and far between but they made things in the long run worse - because they gave me hope. 

Eventually, she lost the ability to speak, to communicate with those around her. Slowly but surely, the illness was killing off her brain. Seizure followed seizure and every time we went to visit, she even more of a shadow of the woman I'd known my entire life. 

On January 7th 2019, we received the call that my Grandmother was finally at peace. 

It's one of the strangest feelings. 

I was heartbroken, yes. Heartbroken that I would never see her again and heartbroken that we'd lost her. 

But in a sense, there was also relief. Relief because we had lost her many years ago when she had lost herself and finally after such a long and drawn out battle, she was at peace. Finally, she was with my Grandfather who passed in 2014. 

On the 24th January, we laid my Grandmother to rest in a beautiful ceremony that celebrated her life and the lasting memory that she has left behind. 

It will be a challenge for me to continue this story with the events of late, especially with some of the storylines that I have planned for upcoming chapters. 

But, I have always loved to write and I always will love to write. For that reason, I can't give up on this story just because it's hard. Part of that is thanks to my Grandmother, who always pushed me to do the things I loved in life. So for that reason, I'd like to dedicate the rest of this story to one of the love's of my life.

Grandmother June, this one's for you.