Liar//MYG✔️

Chapter 4//Feelings Are Fatal

One of the two, Min Yoongi or Yoon Jinae, were always over-compensating.
It had been a staple of their relationship since their childhood. One had always put in a little more effort than the other. One had always tried too hard to make up for the short-comings of the relationship.

When they had first met, it had been Yoongi. While the two young children had felt an immediate connection because of their shared piano teacher and parents' friendship, Jinae hadn't been overly keen on getting to know the new and strange boy. She had been very shy and guarded as a child by nature; on the playground, she was always the girl who sat on the swings alone. Of course, she liked to play with the other children, it was just that she was afraid to start conversations. While Yoongi had been of the same mind, he quickly grew bored of the silent evenings he was forced to spend at the Nam's home. Their parents would talk for hours after dinner and Yoongi would sit in silence as Jinae read a book or colored. He quickly became bored with the silent evenings where he'd sit with Jinae in the living room as their parents conversed. It didn't matter how many times he tried to occupy himself, he always ended up feeling frustrated and lonely. However, every attempted conversation he made with the slightly younger girl always failed quickly. Her answers to his childish questions were always short and she didn't inquire into his childhood interests. While most would have grown discouraged and disinterested, Yoongi just found that he tried harder to get to know Jinae.
Eventually, Jinae overcame her shyness and warmed up to the slightly older boy. The two began their close friendship. No longer were the long evenings of visiting silent for the two; they had one another for amusement.
From this beginning, a pattern had developed of unequal efforts.
This pattern endured.

The balance of effort would swing from Jinae to Yoongi from time to time. One would grow a little more distant and detached, not hanging around or showing up. One wouldn't call or text the other first. The other, afraid of losing the one they believed themselves to be closest to would work hard to spend time with the other. Then things would return to a temporary balance.

Jinae had been the one to overcompensate many times as they'd grown older and closer. Yoongi was quiet by nature and would grow reclusive when he was struggling with his insecurities and anxieties. He grew detached from Jinae especially during these times, she was the one who knew him best after all and he couldn't lie to her like he could others.
Yoongi often overcompensated when he felt that he wasn't worthy of Jinae's friendship. He told himself that he couldn't lose her permanently, it would break him. So, if he broke a promise, he'd go visit her in the middle of the day. He'd send flowers superfluously. He'd text her and call her daily, something neither of them rarely had time for. Sometimes his behavior boarded clingy as he desperately tried to reach for the feeling of calm security within their friendship.

Jinae was the person Yoongi was closest to. She knew some of his deepest secrets and fears. Naturally, he knew the same of her. They knew one another better than they knew themselves and better than any other. However, their friendship was riddled with many faults. Their insecurities and fears had more control over it than they did. No matter how hard they tried, they still lied to one another. They still held back with the intent of protecting one another. They were still afraid to be completely honest, and so, without even meaning to, they hurt each other.

Deep down, both of them knew this. Both knew that it wasn't healthy, what they shared.
However, they let it continue, believing that if it had lasted this long, it could last a little longer.

A/N:

So, first off, I would like to say that I always have a purpose for writing difficult and tricky subjects into my works. I know that toxic and unhealthy relationships are extremely harmful. Trust me, I do. I've experienced them myself.

However, I'm hoping that through presenting this type of dynamic in Liar, I'll be able to shed light and awareness on the issue.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on the topic!

As always, please eat well and take care of yourselves! Please try to find happiness where you are, even if it's only a small spark.

Featured Song: feelings are fatal by mxmtoon

(edited May 2019)

*Novi*