Liar//MYG✔️

Chapter 5//Seesaw

Jinae had another performance coming up. The event would be longer and in a larger concert hall than the last one. She was nervous and practiced feverishly, losing sleep and staying home from her usual engagements to memorize the piece. She didn't eat well, and her sleep was disturbed by an unusual amount of unease surrounding the concert. At night, she laid awake, thinking about all of the mistakes she had made that day while practicing. During the day, she was preoccupied during her work as she devised ways in which she could play the notes more smoothly and fully. Her mind just wouldn't let the topic rest.

However, the main source of her anxiety came not from the upcoming performance but from the question that plagued her constantly, "Should I ask Yoongi to attend?" Then, of course, another question followed, "Would he if I did?" These questions rang in her mind, prodding both her conscious and unconscious into states of nervousness. It plagued her in the early mornings and late nights. It lurked in the corners of her mind as she taught her students how to properly move their fingers across the black and white keys of her piano. It pricked her nerves each time she picked up her cell phone.
She put it off for as long as she could, and every time her manager asked her how many tickets she wanted to reserve she'd give a vague answer, saying she needed to confirm them first. She knew her manager was growing impatient, and with only a week and a half left, she knew it was time to face her fear.

After her last student left for the day, she picked up her phone and found Yoongles in her contacts. Impulsively she hit the call button. The call rang.
And rang.
Then it rang some more.
It rang until she reached Yoongi's voicemail. He was busy, again. Feeling a mix of relief and disappointment, Jinae left a short message asking him to call her back soon.

******

Yoongi missed Jinae's call due to his afternoon meeting. He listened to the voice mail, and for a fleeting moment, he considered calling her back right away.
He didn't though, opting to shower and go back to his apartment first.

Two hours later he picked up his cell phone and finally called Jinae back.

******
Yoongi's call interrupted Jinae's dinner, the first full meal that she'd cobbled together in two days. She sighed as she set her bowl down on the table and picked up her phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jinae, it's me. I missed your call earlier when I was at an assignment meeting," Yoongi replied with a calm, but tired tone.

"Oh, sorry I completely forgot you had one so late in the afternoon today!" Jinae immediately jumped to an apology, feeling bad that she'd called while Yoongi had been in an important editor's meeting.

"It's fine. What's up?" Yoongi was sitting on his bed, relaxing after his long day of work.

"Oh um, well you know I have a concert coming up next Saturday." Jinae's body was ramrod straight as she tried to overcome her nerves. "I was wondering if maybe you'd like to come to this one." It was a seemingly harmless, small, insignificant word choice that Jinae used, 'this one', and she didn't give it a second thought. However, it sent a stab of sadness through Yoongi's heart.
Jinae wanted him to come to this concert, another performance in the multitude of ones he had missed. Yoongi knew that.
Would he be able to attend? That was the question, and it was a simple one.
Yoongi was no longer in a relaxed position, and his heart beat quickly as he tried to come up with an excuse for his answer.

"Oh yeah, I'd love to come." He continued to reach for his intended words, the truth. Yoongi knew that he had a full weekend of assignments and wouldn't be able to attend the performance.

"Okay, so will you be there? Do I need to get you a ticket?"

"Yeah, I'll be there. I can pick my ticket up on Sunday." Yoongi swallowed and frowned in defeat. Across the line, Jinae smiled slightly, allowing her small hopes to rekindle.

"Okay, I'll do that. Goodnight Yoongles, I'll text you."

"Goodnight Jinae. Sleep well," Yoongi replied, trying to control his tone in spite of his feeling of defeat and guilt. Jinae ended the call and finished her dinner happily.

She did this every time; no matter how many times Yoongi had promised to come and not shown, she let her hopes soar. He'd said he was coming, and she didn't want to doubt him unfairly. So, she expected him to come. That night, Jinae practiced late into the night. She wanted Yoongi to applaud her performance next weekend.
Jinae wanted him to be proud of her.

******

Yoongi rubbed his face with his hands. Every single time she asked, he said yes. Every time. He swore under his breath, a bad habit that he knew Jinae hated, but he felt so frustrated with himself. He could never just give a 'no' as his answer to her. From the time the two of them were children, Yoongi hadn't been able to tell Jinae 'no', even if that meant he was lying to her. He hated having to tell her he couldn't be there for her. He hated seeing the look or hearing the sound of disappointment in her voice that his honesty would surely bring.

Yoongi knew he wouldn't be able to go watch her play next weekend. He had a full day of photo shoots and reporting. There was no possible way that he would be able to make it to the concert.
Of course, he wanted to go and watch her. Every time he heard her play, he loved it. Her style and stage presence were both so unique to him. She was talented and beautiful, and he could listen to her all day.

He sighed and rubbed his temples. He was in the same mess he always got himself into.

Yoongi had lied to Jinae, and he was going to break yet another promise.

A/N:

oof, Yoongi, and his lies.

Jinae is so trusting even when she shouldn't be, and I honestly relate so much.

The story is beginning to unfold you guys, you should promptly begin to hang onto your wigs, as the next few chapters may snatch them.

Please eat well and take care of yourselves. Please do try to find happiness where you are, even if it's only a glimmer.

Featured Song: Seesaw by BTS

(Edited June 2019)

*Novi*