Imperfect

Chapter 6

IWANNAGETBETTER-I'm so sorry, and it's okay if you hate me alright? I lied. I lied big time. So my Dad's been warning me not to tell you exactly what's happened in case you guess who I am and then this whole thing will be a waste of time and everything. But I don't think this is a waste of time.

Okay, so I lied about having a little brother in jail, he's actually only five and is living with my step dad. My sister was in college, though she didn't abandon us, no something else happened. I'm living with my Dad. My Mom and one set of my grandparents are gone.

I know you probably, hate me for lying and won't ever message me again, but I had to stop messaging you. Not because of you, it was just so I could get over what's happened. Please, please, please forgive me, I hope I didn't do anything to you.

Also something else that you might find interesting; after we started corresponding I almost completely stopped having anxiety attacks and as soon as I became distant they came rushing back again.

I think it's because of you, and for that I thank you. Even my Dad's said that I should continue messaging you, so take that as a compliment. I'm pretty sure everyone else who was going through this either didn't bother or blew it in their first few messages, so, thank you. I really owe you.

Please can we continue where I messed up. I will be most grateful. I still need to come out to my Dad, not that I ever came out to anyone else, but I really could d with someone coaching me through this.

Hopefully, talk to you soon. Bye.

Chocolate!-I'm glad you told me the truth and I'm sorry you started having panic attacks again. It does make me happy to know that I've helped you even the slightest bit.

You lying to me doesn't change anything, and I understand that you must be going through something really bad. I'm glad your father's good with us chatting because I enjoy it as well.

Coming out, is something I think my parents don't even think me capable of. It's like they just assume that I'll never fall in love, or have a crush on somebody-which I never have so maybe that part is slightly true. But anyway, they know that me being both homosexual and heterosexual is obvious, though I won't explain why.

Now for you I have no idea. Like literally I have never ever witnessed someone coming out as either gay or bisexual so I am the last person who'll know what to do. If I were you-which I'm not-I would probably come out to a friend to see how they react to that way of coming out.

So I literally have no idea and I'm pretty sure that it's some sort of trial and error thing. At least you don't live in a place like Kenya. It's illegal to be LGBT there, for now that is anyway.

How do you think your Dad will react, how do you think your stepdad will react? You know there are so many questions I could ask that are pretty risk free of me figuring out who you are, I should've asked you sooner. Talk soon, bye.

And my happy attitude is restored! Though I can't act too happy otherwise we might not go the aquarium, which I love.

I may get an amazingly emotional solo at the end of the play, but for the entirety of the first act I don't do anything, so I'm working on the sets, whilst the others are rehearsing.

"Hey, need some help?" Offers the guy who's in charge of everything, bar the actors.

"Ok, I'm good." I say.

"Please let me help, I can pretend I'm busy that way." He jokes.

"Alright, but I'm just dumping junk around the stage in a certain way, so it's not that interesting." I tell him.