strange sweet feelings (A Nigerian Gay Story)

chapter 10: letting go

He began "mummy,you know I really love and really care for you and I know you also want the best for me, but sometimes what you want might not be what you get. mum I can't get married not because I don't want to but because..."he paused

His mother was suddenly interested, this was a topic that involved marriage something that fred rarely discussed, maybe he already impregnated a yoruba girl, she thought, what happened to all the Igbos in Lagos, even a girl from Delta state would have been better she thought to her self, but she decided to ask him " because of what my son?"

" Mama like i said I really love you, but i can't get married because I  and Victor we are already engaged his my fiancee".

His mother looked at him dumbfounded, she couldn't speak, she starred at both of them together in disgust, she could not believe that she was actually bothered that her son had impregnated a yoruba girl, this was far worse, her own son gay?, Fred was joking if he thought she was going to accept that nonsense he just spat out just like that, she looked at them again, most especially victor, she couldn't believe she thought of him as a decent young man, what a shame to his family, he can't just come and bewitch her son with all the curse his ancestors had laid on him, she ignored them, went to the room packed her bags and left.

Fred's mum stopped calling she never even said hi, she was so ashamed to think about him. After a while she sent him a text message telling him that she had decided to disown him, that she prefers him being alone than him a man marry his fellow man, that she would rather die than see that happen.

Fred knew this was a big issue, he loves his mother so much and he also loves victor so much, he wasn't sure what to do, should he choose Victor or his family?.

Ever Since his mum left him, if Victor came around he would get angry, every little thing victor did irritated him. He started feeling like Victor was the cause of all his problems.

Victor who was noticing the sudden change in fred attitude was getting tired of it, he has endured it enough, he told Fred that he was done, he loved him but he never wants everyone to see him as the cause of their problems, he dropped his engagement ring on the table and left.

Fred was so confused he started to realise how stupid he was pushing away the only person he had truly loved just because he wanted to please his mother, he knew pushing Victor away was foolish but he had to make his mother happy, perhaps she should arrange a girl for him, that could work.

Fred explained all that occurred to mama telling her he was ready to start up a family with a woman. mama was so happy she replied clearly overjoyed by the current news  "oh God I thank you for making it possible that my son has come back to his right senses, my own son, gay!, tufiakwa!." She exclaimed

After few months mama arranged the daughter of her best friend, everyone was so happy that finally Fred had found a beautiful woman to marry and share the rest of his life with. Fred on the other hand wasn't so happy, he knew he had laid foundation for a life that will be filled with regrets.