strange sweet feelings (A Nigerian Gay Story)

chapter 34 : The beginning (Last chapter)

Fred's POV

It's been a week since I had arrived in Abuja, I had settled in quite well, but that was the least of my problems, my problem isn't victor, for the first time in many months victor isn't the reason why I'm on my bed , in tears and filled with regrets.

If I had known, I would have never given up on her that easily, I would have atleast reassured her that I still loved and cared for her, I would have apologised to her, even if I would still try to fight for victor, I would have also fought for her. She died knowing she was all alone, without the love of her only child.

I had gotten up to make myself a cup of coffee before rushing to the site to see how the refurbishing is going. My phone kept ringing and it was an unknown number so I had ignored it, it called for about five more times, so I had decided to pick it up.

I picked it up hearing the worst news of my life, uncle Donatus had called informing me of mama's death, she fell sick over a month ago and she had insisted that no one contacted me, I was also told by uncle Donatus that before she died, she had made it a point that I was let no where close to her body, or her burial service.

He told me she also said she loves me, but she's not sorry and will never forgive me, they had buried her few days ago before I was called, uncle Donatus emphasized on the fact that, he was in no support at all of the path I have chosen, but he felt I needed to know, that the one family, I have in this world is gone, I am all alone.

Without mama, without victor, and literally without Belinda.

I was still crying when I heard the hotel phone ring, I picked it up and the receptionist told me I have a visitor, I didn't ask her who it is, as I am already expecting someone, the contractor who is currently working on my new branch.

I quickly opened the door when I heard a knock, and when I did I froze, I think the person also froze.

"I'm so sorry" victor said bursting into tears
" I couldn't do it, I made a big mess, I'm so sorry, for everything, I'm sorry, but I can't let you go or stop loving you, you can be ashamed of me, or hide me, or hate what we are, are choose the world over us, you can lie about what we are, and not lift a finger to fight for our love, but i love you and I'll do all that for us, I'll do it because I love you, I'll give you time, time to accept what you are, and what I am to you, I'm sorry fred but I just realized how much I love you and how much pain I made you feel, but I can't go back, please fred don't let me go back"

I dragged him to my chest and hugged him, while I cried, I cried over everything, I cried over mama, I cried for not being there for her, for not living her enough, I cried for the fact that I had not thought of reaching out to her since the day she left, I cried because I missed victor, because I had disappointed him countless of times, because I have failed the love I have for him, I had torn his trust and I had made him doubt the love I have for him countless of times, I cried because I felt sorry for myself, sorry that somewhere in me I still do not want to accept what I am, I cried because I just realized I loved victor so so much, and he was worth risking all for.

I and victor later settled in, in the hotel, I told him about mama and we decided to set up a burial mass for her, we decided to light candles and pray for her soul for a week, I know she wasn't really fair towards me, but I could understand her, No Nigerian parent would pray for their children to be gay, and I understood as I was homophobic before I found out about my sexuality.

We've been praying for mama, and lighting candles for her, for 6 days now, tomorrow would be the burial mass and I would be at peace after that, I know I couldn't be at her main burial, but I wanted to do something to honour her, because she meant alot to me.

I had persuaded victor into sending E-mails to Efe, which were never responded, I understand the guy, if anyone did that to me, I wouldn't forgive them for any reason. Victor also tried calling Efe severally but he never picked, after sometime we got to know that he had been blocked.

Victor and I have been together for almost two months now, the branch of my office would be opening on sarturday, I invited some of my close friends and Victor's, I know I and victor had decided when we came back together that we would take it slow. We have known each other for almost two years, and I felt like all the ups and down and all the battle we've fought in our relationship has come to make us stronger than ever. I am ready, I'm ready to take a step with the one I truly love. Sure we'll have to keep it on a low, we are still In Nigeria. But i felt the time is right.

On the opening night I had invited some of our close friends, Belinda was present along with Biola, itoro who I had come to know few months ago and many other of our friends, those who knew I was gay and few who didn't know but had no homophobic attributes, I had invited them and stated my intention.

The ribbon was cut and everyone got in for the real party. I had intentionally let victor go in before anyone else and as I saw him read the letters on the banner facing the entrance, I saw him turn tears already filling his eyes, as I bent down on one knee, pulling out a simple silver ring and said

" Will you marry me?".

THE END!.

Or maybe the beginning😭😭😭, it's officially over!. Special thanks to y'all that has been following this story from the start. And also those of you that just started following this story.
I appreciate all your encouraging, wonderful and kinda hilarious comments, and your vote through every chapter.

Special thanks to
mariopresh Rapha-El simzypee youjeii 

SossVilla sammiatadekunle support and comments, y'all have been lovely throughout.

Any questions about characters or stuffs you find confusing in the story, you can post it on my wall or send me a direct message.

I love y'all💓.