At times, our lives are set to change through no fault of our own. It's a change you know will break your heart. Like realizing him and I would never be. When your heart breaks, it is the saddest thing in the world. All your energy leaves you and everything in your life seems to lose all meaning.
He would never be interested in girls like me. Girls who are sick, who have scars up and down their thighs. He likes girls like her. A beauty queen, perfection.
"Are you okay, Diana?" Jake waved his hand in front of my face. I gave him a fake smile. "I'm fine, just kinda zoned out." He nodded and started to talk about how Coach Jones had promised to now take them to a club. After hearing that, I zoned out again.
I started to think of how stupid I was. At this moment, I didn't want this anymore. I wanted to get out of cheer. I looked ahead at where they were. He had his arm around her shoulder. She had her's behind his back. I felt anger. I wanted to just get out of here.
"Diana! Are you okay?" Jake reached over and wiped a tear. Without me speaking, he opened his arms. I fell into him and cried. My wet tears stained his uniform. He rubbed circles in my back. "Is she okay?" Said the voice I didn't want to hear at the moment. I felt Jake's chest move.
"Everyone to the bus!" Everyone started to run and cheer towards the exit. Jake and I trailed behind slowly. He would suddenly give me sad looks. We all piled in and the bus headed towards the hotel.
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I placed my duffle bag on the bed. We had just arrived at the hotel. I was sharing a room with Jake. Louis had wanted a room with Shyanne. He said he had to talk to her privately. But I wasn't stupid, he just wanted sex. I hadn't said a thing though. But my silence soon ended.
"So, what's going on bitch?" I looked up. Jake laid on the bed beside mine. "Nothing." He gave me a "bitch please look". "I'm not dumb, Diana. I know girls cry for a reason." I sighed. "It's boy problems."
He nodded and looked at me as if me wanted me to go on. So I did. "I like this guy, but..."
"I KNEW IT! I FUCKING KNEW IT!" He did a fist pump in the air. "You like Louis. Don't you?" I nodded. "Yes, but he doesn't like me. I mean why would he? He has Shyanne. She's perfect." He shook his head. His hands were placed on my cheeks. He faced me and looked into my eyes.
"Perfect girls aren't real. And real girls aren't perfect. You're amazing just the way you are. If I were straight, you'd totally be my bae." I laughed. "I wish, Jake." He patted my head. "He'll realize what he's missing soon. Now go change, we're all going out." I shook my head.
"I have better things to do. I haven't called my dad in a while. And I really don't want to leave the insides." He nodded and walked to the restroom to change. I pulled my phone out and called my dad. It rang three times before he picked up the phone.
"Hey, darling." I smile appeared on my face at the sound of my old man's voice.
"Hey daddy, how are you doing?"
"I'm a little sick. I've been running a cold. How's London?" Jake waved me goodbye and mouthed 'goodnight'.
"Ugh, I miss home. Everything is so different." I heard him chuckle.
"Oh, sweetie. We miss you too. Well, I at least know I do. I need someone at home with me."
"You don't know how badly I wish I could go home."
"Soon, sweetie, soon. How did it go with your mother?"
"Honestly, horrible. She told me everything. But, just because you aren't my real dad, doesn't mean I'm gonna stop calling you dad..."
"Honey, you should. What about Tom?"
"I don't care about Tom. Or mom. You've been there for me even though you knew I wasn't your daughter. Mom left me to go with Tom. Neither of them came to get me for 12 years. If I were to call someone dad, it should be you."
"Okay, I guess. Listen, I've got to get up early tomorrow. Call me soon. Love you, honey."
"Bye daddy. I love you, too!"
I hung up and set my phone on the nightstand. I was alone now. With nothing to do. I stood up and decided to go on a walk. It was a little cold out, so I put on my blue sweater and slipped my phone in my back pocket. As soon as I exited the hotel lobby, the cold air hit me. Goosebumps rose over my arms.
I turned right and started walking. I had no idea of where I was walking. Soon enough I saw a little girl crying. She had a blue coat on, a pink dress underneath. I walked towards her. Her blond locks tied in little pigtails on top of her head.
"Are you okay?" The child looked up at me. Her nose and cheeks red from crying. "I-I lost my mummy. I-I don't know where she is." Louder cries came put of her mouth. I crouched down beside her and wiped her tears.
"What's your name, baby?" Her eyes looked into mine. "Lux." I picked her up. "Tell you what, Lux. You and I are gonna look for your mummy. Okay?" She smiled and nodded her head fast.
I looked around. "Lux, do you see mummy?" She looked around. She let out a small "nope". I sighed and started walking. I tried looking for someone who looked like the little baby in my arms.
10 minutes later, I started to grow tired. "Lux, you're getting heavy. I'm gonna put you down, but you will hold my hand. Okay?" She nodded as I set her down. Up ahead there seemed to look like a coffee shop. I pulled Lux beside me. As I stepped in, a sweet smell of cinnamon filled my nose. I ordered a coffee for me and a small warm milk for lux.
We both sat beside a window. "How did you loose your mum, Lux?" She shrugged. I looked out the window. A lady got my attention. She was crying and seemed to be asking people questions. Her hair seemed to be dyed white. She stood tall.
A man that seemed to be following her, pointed towards me. Her eyes lightened and she ran to the entrance. "Lux!" She ran towards us and hugged the little girl. "Mummy!" The man behind them smiled at the sight. She pulled back and attacked me in a hug. "Thank you for finding my baby. I'm Lou, by the way." The now calm lady, shook my hand.
The man that stood behind her, held the little girl tightly. I stood in awe. I wished I had had a family like that. Not once was my family this close. "Lux, tell Diana thank you." Lux reached over to hug me and blew me a kiss.
"You know, Lux really likes you. Where do you live?" "I live in London, I'm actually here because I'm a cheerleader." She nodded and stood thinking. "How would you like babysitting lux? Well if you don't have a job...." I nodded.
Her husband walked up to her and said they had to get going. I quickly changed numbers with Lou. "Bye, Lux!" She waved. And once again was thanked for finding the little girl.
After I paid for our drinks I headed back to the hotel. The streets were semi empty. Well, except for the drunks that were attempting to get home.
I opened the lobby doors, finding a drunk Louis in a chair. The lobby man walked up to me. "Could you get him up go up his room? He's been moaning the name Diana ever since he's gotten here."
I sighed and headed towards Louis. "Louis?" He lazily looked up. His eyes were droopy. "Diana!" But, his eyes twinkled as my name fell out of his lips.
"Let's get you to bed." he stood up and we both walked into the elevator. I mean wasn't gonna walk a drunk up the stairs. "Do you remember your room combination?" Louis shook his head. What was I supposed to do now? "Diana, I'm tired." he started to lean towards me. He was placing 149 pounds over another small 123 pounds.
I opened my door and pulled him inside. "You're gonna stay here till Shyanne gets back." He paid no attention to me and started to undress. "What are you doing?!" He looked at me. "What the hell does it look like? I'm getting ready for bed."
I threw my hands in the air and walked to the restroom to change. Why was I doing this? Cause you're deeply in love with him, idiot. Once I walked out, he was sound asleep on jake's bed. I wasn't gonna wake him up, so I left him and went to bed.
How was I in love with this drunk, confused and good-looking teenager?
