Dear Gen: A love letter

Chapter Twelve

For Andy, love wasn't terrifying. It was simple. He loved you, and that was that. I've always wondered about that kind of love. How does it just happen? For me, love has always been complicated. And I was so tired of complicated. Perhaps you were, too. But there you were, and here we are, together, wondering how on Earth Andy could have fallen so easily and so completely with you. What was it like to have someone fall for you like that Gen?

As 1925 came to an end, you seemed to begin to cautiously dip your toe in the water of love, slowly opening up more to the idea of having an actual relationship with Andy that extended outside of letters. Whenever you mentioned that you may be able to come up to visit, Andy always pounced on the idea, insisting that you do. He loved you and wanted to be with you. Him leaving the ranch wasn't easy, though, and you taking time off work wasn't easy either. Though, I do wonder often why, if he wanted to see you so much, that he didn't travel down to San Francisco more often. Why did you always have to do the traveling to see him, and not the other way around?

~

Mokelumne Hill

Dec. 4 1925

Dear Genevieve:-

I received your sweet little letter yesterday, I'm glad to hear you're thinking of coming up in January. You know you promised me you would come up and spend a week now don't for-get. I hope you'll get more rest the next time. I'll bet you was tired after our trip to the mountains that day over all the bumps and no lunch. I was sure hungry and I'll bet you was too but you wouldn't admit it though.

Next time we'll take a lunch a long.

I have been doing some more joy riding but I didn't have any sweet little girl with me though

I made two trips to Stockton in the last week Maybe if I go often enough I might get civilized after while.

My Dad turned his truck in for one a little bigger. So I drove the old one down and brought the new one back. So now I have a job driving a brand new truck my brother drives days and I drive nights.

I have a nice moonlight ride every night all by myself and gee that moonlight makes me lonesome for one sweet little girl and you know who she is, too, don't you, Gen. But guess I'll be lonesome for her for a good many days from what you told me when you were up here but just same, I'll claim you for my little sweetheart until you tell me that you're not

So with a great big hug and kiss I'll say good-bye for now.

As ever

Andy

~

I wouldn't say Stockton is all that cosmopolitan these days—at least, compared to San Francisco, anyway—but maybe it was back then. Reading this letter, I think I'm beginning to understand why Andy was hesitant to travel to San Francisco: he didn't believe he was "civilized" enough. Apparently he wasn't civilized enough even for Stockton. Perhaps that is why he often apologizes for his poor spelling and grammar, or for not shaving, or being too forward with his feelings.

Despite loving you and unable to stop himself from telling you so, I think Andy believed he wasn't good enough for you. Surely there was someone (or more than one) out there who was better suited for you. Maybe that's why he gives you an out: I'll claim you for my little sweetheart until you tell me that you're not.

You never did, though. While it seems you are reluctant to enter a relationship with him, you never told him you were no longer his sweetheart, and he was no longer yours. Why?

~

Mokelumne Hill

Dec. 10. 1925

Dear Genevieve:

I received your sweet little letter last nite. So glad to hear that you enjoy mine.

I sure do enjoy your letters even though you do kid me about Helen sending those little Xs of course I don't know what they mean. But I'm thinking if you ever sent me any I could make a pretty good guess

Anyway I'm not wanting any Xs from anybody but you. But I suppose you send so many in all your other letters that you haven't any left when you write to me or else you're afraid you might make me to happy

I guess I can fight for mine when you come up I wouldn't blame you Gen if you brought a great big club with you the next time you come up so you could beat me up for being such a nut.

Now don't you ever think I wouldn't want to put up with you for a week. I'd just love to put up with you the rest of my life for you're the sweetest little girl I ever knew. And I'd sure love to make you happy. And I'd never want to see you anyway but happy and believe me that true.

I'll be waiting for January to come so that I can see you again. So with a great big hug and kiss I'll say good-bye for now

As ever

Andy

P.S. If you should have any little Xs to spare Gen remember me.

~

I can just see you grin mischievously as you read this letter, the apples of your cheeks plumping up at Andy's teasing. Perhaps this was why you kept writing back to Andy. Were you going to spend the rest of your life with him? Maybe, maybe not. For now, this sweet cowboy could write a letter that made you smile, and maybe that was all you needed at the time.

So when you wrote your reply to him, you let your pen slip a little. Only a little.

~

Mokelumne Hill

December 16, 1925

Dear Genevieve:

I received your nice long letter to-day and enjoyed it very much. Those are the kind of letters I like the real long ones.

I got the slip of your pen too Gen even though it was only a little slip I could see it alright and it sure makes me happy next time let your pen slip just a little more.

Now don't think I'll be starting any fights when you come up again Gen Because I always get the worst of it and besides they say fighting bad for the eyes Guess I found that out to. Maybe you for-get what I still remember

I haven't for-gotten the nice shinner I got once. And I sure have been kidded a plenty about it too. So the next time you come up Gen I'll try to show you a good time and take any place you wish to go.

I'm not driving truck now, I have been doing a little horse back riding for a few days changing the cattle around on different pasture and giveing my new dog his first lessons on how to drive cattle.

It has been alful cold up here for the last few days every morning there's a big frost just like a snow storm. I'm kind of glad I'm not driving truck these nites I'm thinking I might freeze to the seat if I was. But I suppose I'll have to start again in a few nites. I'm not so ambitous but I've just got to keep going.

Guess I have told all the news So with a great big bug and kiss I'll say good bye for now.

As ever

Andy

P.S. Next time make the slip a little bigger, like that X

~

Andy's giant "X" doesn't surprise me. He loved you, and that was that. His heart was a big "X" from day one. You, though, were just now starting to slip, to crack open. With a slip of your pen, you offered just a peek at how you really felt about Andy. Though we don't have this letter, I know you wrote the smallest, teeny, little "x."

Only a "slip" of your pen, huh, Gen? Yeah, right.