Complex Charm

Chapter 9

She was surprised to see that he was still sitting there after that download she gave. As she sat back down, he straightened up. "Okay," she said. "I'm not sorry for what I said, but I'm sorry for holding all of that in for so long. That is why I agreed to meet you here."

"No, I understand," Quincy nodded. " I didn't know you still felt that way after all these years." Charmaine deeply wondered how he thought the drama between them wouldn't affect her, but instead of saying anything just stared down at her unfinished coffee. "But I wanted to say that I am sorry."

Charmaine looked up. She thought she was hearing things. "What did you say?"

Quincy sighed. "Yeah, that was part of the reason I wanted to see you, too. To say that I am sorry for all the things I've done to you. You were and still are a wonderful woman. I don't doubt that. I was hoping there was forgiveness in your heart for me, and that you'd feel like we could try this again. I have changed, Charm. I'm taking care of my kids, showing up for them. I cut ties with all the toxic friends I had, told my baby mamas what it was, and I made sure they understood that we were just co-parenting. I don't want to play games anymore. I love you. I just didn't realize it beneath the BS I was putting you through. And I'm willing to leave you alone if that is what you want. But I really want to try again. Let me own up to my wrongdoing. We can have that intimacy again, in every way."

Charmaine saw the sincerity in Quincy. She wants him too, but...that same sincerity existed in him years ago. At the beginning of their relationship, they were inseparable. Nobody could tell them anything. They were able to share their darkest secrets with each other and still love despite that. But that was all they had in common now.

"I'm sorry, Quincy. I do love you, but that is all we have in common at this point. I wish no ill-will upon you, but I can't be in your life any longer. I have forgiven you for what has happened. I'm sorry I haven't made it easy for you. I should have faced you sooner, and this wouldn't have dragged on for so long." Tears welled up again, only this time Quincy was right there with her.

He let out a sigh. "I understand." His disappointment was apparent, but it was toward himself. He had the girl he wanted then lost her to his foolish decisions. He really did a number on her, and he had the nerve to show up in her life uninterrupted. He should have left her alone, let her continue life without him. He realized at this moment that some things can't be fixed, especially not a broken heart. It may heal, but it will never be what it once was. There is always a scar. "Well, I'm glad we did this. I was hoping for good news, but this is what needed to happen."

Quincy looked at Charmaine, seeing the waterfall she tried to hold back. His heart sank."Yep, this is what needed to happen. At least now we have closure, " Charmaine replied. Her last cup of coffee was cold, so she decided she'd toss it before getting back on the road. That's enough caffeine for the day. "But I must say, you still look great. Better, even."

Quincy managed a smile. "Thanks, I was going to say the same about you. I know you're doing well with your career. When I was delivering flowers to your job, I was shocked to see that you were one of the best. I knew you'd make something of yourself. Even when you were broke, you still managed to get through it and thrive in college."

"Thanks," Charmaine replied. "I appreciate it. I wish you didn't wear my favorite color."

Quincy chuckled. "I remembered. You always said it looked good on us. And I agree."

They both laugh. "Right." Charmaine sighed then looked at the time. "Okay, Q. I have to get going. I have some errands to run, and I want to beat traffic on my way back home."

"Yeah, we should get out of here." They both get up to leave and head to the parking lot. He walks Charmaine to her car to spend a little quiet time with her. She didn't decline. As they approached the vehicle, Quincy stopped. He tried to think of something else to say but came up with nothing. "Well, I guess this is it."

She agreed. "Looks that way. I wish you well."

"Same to you, Charm. Keep doing well." Before either of them knew it, they were hugging. Since it was the last time they'd see each other, Charmaine figured it wouldn't hurt anything. She hugged him like the past lover he was, close and tight. He returned the gesture and it felt like he wanted her to become part of him. The hug was very comforting, familiar. But it was the last one between them. He gave her back a rub before allowing the hug to break. This really is it. Their hands met, intertwining as they stared at each other. Charmaine used that time to engrave his face into her memory, though she knew that as time passed he may disappear from her mind forever. She couldn't have been more wrong.