Our Own Music

Chapter 9; The Last Storm of Pain

Remember: ENGLISH IS BETWEEN "THESE" NOTATION MARKS AND MOTHER TONGUE IS BETWEEN «THESE»

He was hurled up against the wall, sitting on the cold and hard ground, shuddering with too many states and emotions to resist the waves of despair that came crashing on his soul.

Part of that distress was his; apart from his physical pain, he never had felt so weak, so vulnerable, so scared. Stuck in a cell, at three sadly disfigured women's mercy, one who had a sadist pleasure in his sufferance, one who could crush him with one hand, and one who detained such power inwardly that she could awake the ugliest guilt within his heart and grow her strength from it. And the three of them had strong reasons to hate him.

Yet, he knew they all missed some part of the puzzle. Until so recently, he hadn't even known about his parents' true intentions, and for that, anger and resent darkened the last memories he had of them. He thought highly possible that, intentionally or not, they had made those chemicals explode on Zethrid, Ezor and Acxa, and that Axca's father had then sought revenge. But Keith had never been part of his parents' plans.

The other part of his internal storm, he could feel it, came from another soul. Finding back his own memories had restored some peace within his heart, even though everything was far to be easily settled. And now, he had gained a certitude, one he had accepted, to his own surprise, with bliss and prosperity.

Lance was his soulmate. The only one that had lightened his concerns and worries on his illegal journey. The only one that had lightened his dark obsession and made him forget the weight of his rejection through friendly bickering and comforting teasing. The only one that had lightened his heart from his deepest fears, the ones he hadn't revealed to anyone, even himself. The only light to his obscurity.

The only one that awoke his heart and made it beat to the point it hurted. So much, he had run away and sung about his despair never to be embraced the way Lance embraced his loved ones.

That song, Shiro had found it. Keith recalled the party at Pidge's, where, right before he and Lance had united their souls, Shiro had revealed Keith secrets he didn't even remembered he possessed. But, unlike his indignant panic when he had found out, all he was feeling now was serenity. If he got out of the women's grip, he would have a lot to tell to both of them.

When. When he would get out.

He had to grip tight on all his bits and pieces of lucidity. Without it, he was lost. He could feel, far inside his soul, Lance's conflicted emotions, his struggles, his last glitters of hope swirling deeper and deeper into an ocean, an ocean made of the ghosts of his past and the spirits of his distress. As badly as Keith wanted to tear apart his misery, to open it to the rays of sunshine he got used to, he knew it wouldn't happen until he would learn to deal with his own dark self.

His shudders were less intense, now, and he was able to take a deep breath without awaking a fit of painful convulsions and memories. Slowly, his nausea was dropping too, and, after a few minutes, he could gather all his strength and look up in the room; he didn't know how long he'd been there – hours or days, it didn't matter much – for he couldn't see any natural light. His cell's walls didn't look so strong, but Keith still hoped, for the first time in his life, to find an alternative where both he and the women would be satisfied before being reduced to dig in the ground or blow out the walls. Despite all they've done to him, he couldn't bring himself to completely hate them; he was ashamed of his parents' acts, and he felt bad for them.

Compassion, he thought. That's what they call it.

His heart jumped as he was brought back to reality by the sound of a door opening and slamming shut. His "cell" wasn't soundproof, as he realized now, but in the end, it didn't really surprise him; he was starting to understand better his enemies, and he figured that the building must be more of a hiding place than an actual prison. He had been too confused and fogged by the drugs to notice it earlier.