Lethally In Love

Chapter Four

About an hour has passed since my breakdown in the hospital hallway, and I've managed to make my way back up to my compartment. Finnick isn't around, which makes me thankful, and I start to believe that I'm probably the only active person in the district who isn't following the schedule right now. Despite the fact that I took a shower right before I went to visit Prim, I feel filthy enough to scrub myself down all over again. I lock myself in the bathroom, turning on the hot water again and stripping down to my skin. I spend a solid twenty minutes scrubbing every inch of my skin until it's raw, and then another ten to fifteen scrubbing my already clean hair with lavender shampoo. The mirror is totally steamed up by the time I'm out, but for some reason, I don't feel better.

My towel is wet and cold from my shower this morning, so I grab a new one from under the sink. It's silky and warm, so I wrap myself up like a roll of sushi in it. Not wanting to get dressed and go out to face the world again, I plop down on the lid of the toilet and inhale the steamy air around me, trying to push aside all my negative thoughts... but honestly, when it comes down to it, the only thoughts I have are negative.

A beeping noise catches my attention while I'm in the middle of feeling sorry for myself. I look towards the shower where the touch screen sits on the wall, and realize that it's flashing with red words, a silhouette of a Mockingjay above it. My breath catches in my throat, as I stand and move closer to it.

'Katniss Everdeen, report to headquarters.' Great.

Within minutes, I'm fully dressed in my gray jumpsuit again. I leave my hair out as it is, and my skin looks blotchy with red spots from scrubbing it so hard, but I dismiss my awkward appearance and pull on my boots. I lock up my compartment, and when I turn to the elevator, I run right into Finnick. He's in his jumpsuit now, and his rolled up sleeve reveals the printed schedule on his arm.

"Where are you going in such a hurry?" I push him aside. I'm not ready to deal with another Finnick moment right now.

"I have to go downstairs, I was called to headquarters." I start towards the elevator, but he interrupts my trail.

"How's your sister?" He asks genuinely. I stop and turn to him; his eyes are gentle, and I can tell he sees how broken I probably look.

"She's fine." I say back, my voice quiet.

"Good." He softly as I turn to leave, but I find him grabbing my arm with a gentle grip to stop me again. "How are you?"

"I'm..." I hesitate, almost wanting to tell the truth... but then I remember who I'm talking to. "I'm fine too. I'll talk to you later."

-

My ears pop again like they had this morning as the elevator shoots down further into the ground, and soon it comes to an abrupt stop at my floor. I step out, and feel intimidated by the guards standing their posts on either side of the door. I expect them to question me, but instead, when they see me, they smile and open the doors up for my entry. I'm suddenly overtaken in awe with the sight of the room. A long dark red mahogany table stretched at least twenty chairs down the long hall that's shaped like a dome. The ceiling is made of screens, each one broadcasting a different event that has taken place so far in the uprising, along with speeches from the President, and clips from the 74th and 75th games. It's strange, because I can count at least twelve screens that show my face. It's really beginning to set in now, how important I've been through this whole thing, and it makes me feel uncomfortable.

A sudden applause rings in my ears, and I snap back into reality when I look around me to see the people of District 13. Half of them are dressed in business like apparel, and I realize that I probably shouldn't have worn the jumpsuit to this particular event; it isn't a meeting about the rebellion, its a party for the homecoming of me. Then I see his face since the first time I woke up in the hovercraft... "Katniss!" Plutarch Heavensbe exclaims, moving forward and giving my hand a good shake. "It's good to see you again." It takes every ounce of self control not to claw his eyes out, because for some reason, I feel the same hatred as I did in the hovercraft.