Spider.

Chapter 8 : Asylum

I stumbled to my feet. I padded slowly to the other side of my room and stood infront of the mirror. There were dark circles underneath my eyes and my eyes themselves were a darker brown then usual. My eyes were better before, I remember Simon describing them as 'wild eyes'. I admit I didn't completely understand what he meant, but I knew it certainly was not this. I looked so tired and honestly, tired is all I felt these days. It was as if I could never get enough sleep.

I took the longest possible route to school to buy me some time. I had woken up too damn early and I decided to get ready and leave anyway. There was no chance of me falling asleep again. I reached school just as the bell rang.

My first class was Chemistry. I smiled as Simon slipped into the chair next to me. His cheeks were slightly flushed. He probably ran to class. "You look like shit" he said , but his tone was not nearly as harsh as his words. That's the thing about Simon. He could make hell sound like a freaking resort.
I rolled my eyes as my teacher started rambling on about hydrocarbons. I robotically jotted down notes and thoughts of that night filled my head once more.

"You don't have anything to do with this do you?" he seethed. We had spent over three hours searching for her. If it was up to me, I would be back at the dance.

It was cold and the material of my dress did little to keep me insulated. My dress. Amelia showed up in the same dress I was wearing. The dress I took a month to pick out and spent weeks of allowance on. And Amelia just had to ruin it, just like she ruined Caspar and I. To make matters worse, I made the mistake of finally confessing my feelings towards Caspar, to Simon. He told me that he always knew, he saw the way I looked at Caspar. At that moment Caspar had entered the room. Now he knew what I felt for him. Now he thought I was responsible for Amelia vanishing. What the hell was wrong with him?

"Don't you put this on me!" I yelled. Here I am trying to help him and he had the audacity to blame me? "You two had a fight and she stormed off to God knows where because of something you said. You should be grateful I'm out here with you!". He stepped closer, dangerously close. "You were jealous" he spat. He hands were shaking and his eyes were wide, pupils dilated. "You were jealous that I'm with her and not you!". He was crossing the line here and he knew it. "Shut up Caspar! I would never sabotage your relationship. How dare you even say that!" I was angry now, the weight of his words had me fuming. "You should know me better" I couldn't look at him, this person she created was not the Caspar I was used to. Why did she have to do this? I was fine with Caspar's friendship and I never once pictured us together. I could deal with him dating Amelia, but I couldn't bear the way he was looking at me. As if I was some kind of monster.

"Are you planning on getting up?" Simon asked while he gathered his books. I nodded and followed him out the class. "I'll see you at lunch" he said before heading off to some class that I'm not smart enough to take. I pushed my way through the crowded halls and to my next class. "Hey love" Jesse chirped,falling into step with me. Christ. "Don't call me that" I snapped. "Did you read the note I left you?" He continued and we entered the History class. I remembered the note I found when I woke up the morning after the party. Between the hangover and the nightmare, I didn't get a chance to open it.

"And why would I read your dumbass note?" We were sitting down now and he made sure to scoot his chair unreasonably close to mine.
"Well I think you would find it interesting" his grin was not charming or cocky but sort of...wicked? "Why would I find anything you say interesting?" I say, pretending not to be worried. The was something about his smile that was off. This was not some ordinary note. What the hell is on that piece of paper? A wave of uneasiness washed over me when he looked away,pretending he didn't hear my question. Before I could threaten to rearrange his face for him if he didn't spit it out,
he got up and sauntered out of the room.

I had every intention of running after him, but an appearance from the principal stopped me as I was rising from my seat. He scanned the classroom after adjusting his glasses. "Katherine Harvelle" he nodded in my direction. "Come with me". At that moment, every flunked test and every late assignment nudged at me, causing me to stand up and awkwardly follow Mr. Lennon to his office. I wasn't a bad student. I wasn't exceptionally good either. I was stuck in a sandwich between the super smart and the super challenged. I'd never been called to the principal's office before.

When I entered the office, the last person I was expecting stood teary-eyed before me. Mrs Kendall. "It's Caspar. He's asking for you".

***
The ride to Cullenhill was spent with me pretending to be busy on my phone and Mrs Kendall humming nervously to some indie song on the radio. I did not mean to be rude, but I was also too nervous to speak. But being the polite person I am (most of the time anyway), I decided to try to make smalltalk with Caspar's mom.

"Mrs Kendall I-"
"Oh Kat I've told you numerous times, call me Elaine". I smiled, remembering the time the Kendall's invited me over to dinner and she refused (playfully) to serve me desert until I addressed her as Elaine. Apparently 'Mrs Kendall' made her feel too old. I looked at her and giggled. A small smile tugged at her lips. She was probably thinking about the dinner as well. Just as quickly as it appeared, her smile dissolved and she sighed. She was a beautiful women with jet black hair that fell down below her shoulders. Her pale gray eyes held alot of humour and understanding. Of course, she looked a bit disheveled these days. We all did.

"Elaine" I began, my gaze landing on the trees that lined the side of the street. "I was surprised that Mr Lennon allowed you to take me out of school".
"Well he is our neighbour. He's known Caspar since he was born. I also gave your mom a call to make sure this was okay. I hate using out friendship with him for things like this, but I really am worried about Cas. He wouldn't stop asking for you." I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

What could he possibly want from me? He didn't even seem to notice my presence the last time I visited him. And he had not spoken to me ever since homecoming because he was suspicious of me having something to do the Amelia's disappearance. The last conversation we had involved me screaming at him and trying to make him understand that I was innocent. He wouldn't say a whole sentence without inserting a cuss word to hurt me when I called him.

"Here we are" Elaine said as she parked. The building was a face-brick monstrosity. It was three stories high and all the windows had bars on them. We trudged up the cobblestone path. I felt queasy walking in here, as if coming here signaled the start of something drastic. It meant this was real. Amelia was gone. Caspar was insane. And so was I for coming here after the way he treated me.

I picked at my nails while Elaine signed us in. "He's been very anxious to see you" she said when we stepped into the elevator. "I told him that I could pass on whatever he wants to say to you but he insists on meeting you. I told him to wait until you the end of the day or at least until school was out, but he didn't take it very well " her voice was hasty and apologetic. I nodded because I was to nervous too form a coherent sentence. What did she mean by 'he didn't take it well'? Did he keep insisting? Did he hurt someone? Did he hurt her?

The room we entered was bleak and cold. The walls were stark white. A small desk sat at the far end of the room and there was a single bed tucked into one corner. The ambiance was clinical and uninviting.

On the bed sat a hunched figure, wearing white pants and a pale t-shirt. I shivered.  "Honey?" Elaine called. The usual sweetness in her voice was replaced with anxiety. "Katherine is here for you". Caspar turned around and stood up in one, quick movement. "I'll be right outside" Elaine said, more to Caspar than to me. I nodded nonetheless and watched her walk out the door. Caspar took a step closer and I flinched. He frowned and gestured for me to sit down. I  obeyed and took a seat on the wooden chair at the foot of the bed. Caspar looked better than the last time I had seen him. His hair was washed and neatly pushed back and his face was clean shaven. His eyes however, remained the same. Red and haunted. "Why have you asked for me?" I asked quietly. He sat down on the bed and faced me. "I'm sorry", he said. "I know I have been completely out of line lately. I shouldn't have said those things to you. You were the one who tried to help me and I pushed you away". I was both shocked and relieved at the same time. He was apologizing which meant he was getting better. I looked up from the floor at him and for the first time in weeks, I recognized the boy in front of me.