the outsiders imagines

stories i'd never tell my friends - sodapop

Note: "Stories I'd Never Tell My Friends" is a series I created to delve into the backstories of the Outsiders characters. Each installment will feature a member of the gang and a part of their backstory as imagined by me. The stories will be told from the point of view of the character.

The night my parents died will always be etched into my mind. I relive it every time I close my eyes, every time I walk outside. When they died, part of my soul died too.

Above all, I relive my parents' death every time I eat a piece of chocolate cake.

My mom used to bake a lot. Cookies, pies, bread - she could bake anything and everything. Our neighbors used to flock to our front door whenever my mom turned on her oven, because they could smell whatever she was making from miles away. And she was real generous, too. She'd give at least half of what she'd baked away, even if it was the white chocolate macadamia nut cookies we begged her to keep for us. She couldn't bear the thought of someone being deprived of a sweet treat. She was real nice like that.

But of course, my favorite thing that she baked was her chocolate cake. She used to make it in her special way. First, she'd mix all the dry ingredients together. She'd do that thing were you take all the powder ingredients like flour and put it through a sifter. She said that made the batter really smooth. Then, she'd pour in the eggs and the milk and everything else. My mom would mix it all up, scoop the batter into a pan. Her secret was this: she'd pour half of the batter in, make a thick layer of chocolate chips on top, then pour in the rest of the batter. That way, when you cut into the cake while it was still warm, you'd get a gooey piece of chocolate heaven - made with love. Sometimes, Darry and Ponyboy and I would get too impatient and start cutting the cake seconds after she pulled it out of the oven, while she wasn't looking. If you didn't wait long enough, the cake wouldn't set and it'd turn into a crumbly mess. Still, it was worth it...and worth the scolding we'd get from our mother.

Darry still bakes chocolate cake using her recipe. He does it real well too. In fact, his cake tastes exactly like the one she used to make.

I don't ever eat his cake, though.

The night my parents died, Darry and Ponyboy and I were too sad to leave the house to get anything to eat. We didn't have much food in the fridge, besides the chocolate cake that my mom had baked fresh that morning. We ate it, 'cause we were getting pretty hungry...but I swear, as soon as I took my first bite, I felt like throwing it back up. Because that's the night I learned exactly what pain tastes like. Pain tastes like smooth batter and extra chocolate chips, and a powdered sugar topping. It tastes like chocolate cake made with love.

That's why every time I make chocolate cake, I always add an extra cup of sugar to the batter.  Ponyboy and Darry hate when I do that (Darry says it tastes like diabetes), so I usually end up eating it all by myself. But if I don't add the extra sugar, it'll end up tasting exactly like the cake Darry and Ponyboy and I ate the night our parents died. And no one wants to be reminded of a night like that.

—

I thought it was kind of funny that the whole of Tulsa knew my girlfriend was cheating on me before I even did.

To be honest, I think I did know but I refused to believe it. Think about it. How do you expect a guy to believe that the girl he's in love with would go out and do something like that? The same girl who visits you at work everyday, the same girl you brought home to meet your family, the same girl who wiped your tears away when your parents died. The same girl who said "I love you."

I think if someone says your girlfriend is cheating on you and you believe it, then you're not in love. But what the fuck do I know about love, anyway. Anyone who's an expert on love wouldn't get cheated on, I guess.