Bi-Curious (BoyxBoy)

♥︎ Chapter 8 • Whiplash ♥︎

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What does it mean?
You push me away,
But you still want to explore
Hesitant hands, hesitant words
When will it all make sense to me?
When will it all make sense to you?
When will you make up your troubled mind?
Please, please,
It's giving me whiplash—
Ethan, if you really want me...

Then take me

_______________________________

Bi-Curious
Chapter 8:
"Whiplash"

Charlie

I splash water on my face helplessly, trying to get my face to cool down from its burning red color. My eyes are bloodshot. My body is shaking and my breathing is hard to control. Everything just hurts and it's hard to breathe. He... he made me feel so dirty, so horrible. It fucking hurts.

"I thought I was like... special or wanted and then the next day you go do it with someone else and it just made me feel kinda... like I didn't matter to you at all."

Heartless, I feel heartless. He does matter to me, I just don't want to matter to him.

"Is that all you want from me?"

Bloodshot eyes look into the mirror and all they see is emptiness. I need to feel full, useful. My phone vibrates.

Jamieeee: come over @ 12 tomorrow?

My fingers go to reply, but then I get another text message from Ethan. I don't even remember giving him my number, but now that I think about it, I probably gave it to him the first time he came over. I read the message, my eyes scanning it a million times.

Superstar: hey, so there's this party coming up...

Charlie: Okay. What about it?

Superstar: i want you to go. with me.

Charlie: You sure about that? Want to go to a party with a gay guy?

It takes him a minute to reply.

Superstar: yes. i'm sure.

Charlie: when?

Superstar: tomorrow night, hannah's house. i'll pick you up at 8.

Charlie: Does that mean you're not drinking?

Superstar: not exactly. but i won't drink and drive. i'll call an uber if i have too.

Charlie: I'll go because you want me. Don't be late.

♥︎ • ♦︎ • ♣︎ • ♠︎

I blow my hair out of my eye, continuing to flat iron it. Ethan is supposed to be arriving soon, and I'm already pretty much ready. Red combat boots, black ripped skinny jeans, and a white crop top adorn my figure. I brush on a few coats of mascara and apply my favorite chapstick that is flavored like orange fruit snacks before cleaning everything up and decide to write in Ethan's favorite chair until he arrives to take me to some random person's party.

The doorbell rings at exactly eight and I open it to see Ethan, his hair perfectly styled, his stubble lightly trimmed, and two black studs in his ears. He's wearing a black tank top that's a little too big on him so it hangs off his frame and doesn't leave much to the imagination. He's also wearing his usual black skinny jeans, studded belt, and black cowboy boots. He smiles when he sees me. "Hey."