Bi-Curious (BoyxBoy)

♥︎ Chapter 26 • Depression ♥︎

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I have this leech called depression,
Sometimes, it just sucks the light outta me
Like a parasite, it steals away my life
Attached to me for as long as I can remember,
Sucking, sucking, sucking,
A constant pain like the repeated stabbing of a dull knife
Oh the light, I cannot see
It blinds me, whispers sweet nothings into my ear

I have this leech called depression,
It preys the most when I'm alone
Then all the dark thoughts converge on me
It's my burden,
It's nobody else's
This leech can take on many hosts
And I am infected,
Oh, I couldn't bear to infect you,
For you to have this depression too

It's contagious
I'm contagious
I need to be quarantined
Can't risk you like this,
Can't taint you like this
Misery loves company
And it's your company that I love,
The way our bodies fit together like a glove

But you won't listen
Why won't you just fuckin' listen?
I love you, I love you,
I really fucking do
Can't stand the thought of you getting this ailment too
It's hurting, it's hurting, it's hurting you
It's causing you to leave me,
Ethan, can't you see?
Ethan, Ethan, please—
Please, please, don't leave me
I need to be kissed, I need to be held
But I'm really not well
So I can never give you want you want,
Can never give you what you need

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Bi-Curious
Chapter 26:
"Depression"

Charlie

"Your shit is still at the apartment," I mention, seeing Ethan for the first time in a while. "Great birthday by the way, definitely one for the history books."

Ethan stands silent in front of me.

I look at him and look over his appearance. He doesn't look as broken as I feel, especially considering this is the first time I've seen him since the blow up. I thought he fucking died. He didn't call, didn't text, just took his bike and didn't look back. I haven't gotten sleep since, trying to find out where he was and if he was okay consuming my time, but of course, I don't have Scout's or Carmen's number. I'm right back to what I was before Ethan, alone.

"Do you want me out?" He asks, his hands stuffed in his pockets. He's got a bruise on his cheek from who the hell knows where.

"I didn't want you to leave on my birthday, but that obviously didn't stop you then, now did it?"

He regards me coldly, his eyes empty. "No."

"You aren't looking at me like you love me." I look at my nails, trying to look composed despite being completely and utterly broken inside.

"Guess you know how I feel now." He fires back.

"Why don't we just forget about it? Come home and we'll pretend my birthday never happened," I propose.

Ethan frowns. "You don't seem to understand. You broke my heart." He hisses, teeth clenched.

"I warned you when you first came to my house. I didn't spring this on you. I'm right here. Don't be so spoiled."