Morality | TFP OneShots

Primes Don't Party (2) ~ Optimus Prime x Human!Reader

Note: So I've actually had this saved for years, like actual like prepandemic years. I however had always hoped of being able to finish it and write actual smut but it never happened so I suppose this is all there ever will be for it.

Twenty minutes after leaving the party, and Y/N was awake and on the side of the road throwing up whatever contents were in her stomach. Sure alcohol burned on the way down, but it was twice as unbearable when it came back up. Her throat felt raw and felt as if a fire had burned through it. Optimus had appeared in his holoform, a gentleman as ever as he pulled her hair out of her face. He didn't say anything as he did so even if her brain wasn't registering much past the contents of her stomach on the asphalt it would be something Y/N would be grateful for later, her face was already burning from the embarrassment. Yet this wasn't the first time she had done this and it wasn't Optimus's first time holding back her hair.

Y/N had a drinking problem, yet she was an adult and claimed she knew how to drink responsibly. Except life hurt, and people hurt people and sometimes it felt good to just inhibit yourself from remembering those things for just a few hours. Then she'd go through the hangover, claim she'd never drink again, and then suddenly three days later she's meeting another empty glass. The cycle was vicious but she was trapped in it and she knew she couldn't get out by herself. Finally when she knew that nothing else would be coming up she sat back on her knees, faced only with the truth of how much of a failure she had to be to have ended up in a position like this.

How was it that she had allowed herself to fall so far, and how could she ever expect anything or anyone else to care about her when she could barely ever function properly to care for herself? How could she expect Optimus to ever want her? Some weak insignificant human that would rather slowly poison herself than face the reality around her. Y/N wanted to get out of it, the never ending circle of addiction that she kept spinning herself around in, but at this point she was far to lost that she wouldn't even know where to begin.

Then suddenly she was crying.

"Y/N?"

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I'm such a lame excuse of a human being, and that I constantly put myself through this stuff. I'm stuck and I don't know how to get out of it and it hurts that someone like you could never love me and I guess I'm okay with that because I don't even love me so I don't know why I could ever expect you to and—" Y/N was stopped abruptly by Optimus as he pulled her shaking body into his chest she found comfort in burying her face into the unnaturally soft fabric of his jacket as she couldn't help but continue to cry now muffled sobs. She found that holoforms were unnaturally warm compared to the humans they mimicked, Y/N found herself content with simply clinging to the autobot leader like the pathetic creature she was.

"But I am in love with you. Yes you have a problem and maybe I don't fully understand why, but if I've learned anything on Earth it is that I want to help you because I love you."  Her cries were reduced to sniffles as she titled her head back to look up at Optimus. She never thought that their confession would be with her drunk and throwing up on the side of the road, but Y/N would take what she could get. Except as her sniffles stopped as the words seemed to completely register in a rather drunken hazed mind, she was left with confusion.

"Why?" She had cried herself into exhaustion as she felt her concious slipping away from her.

"What?" Optimus was confused by the question.

"Why would you love someone like me?" Y/N was asleep before any answers could be given.

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Three weeks went by and neither Y/N nor Optimus had spoken about the drunken confession. She didn't remember most of it, but there was enough of a fuzzy memory for her to know that it had been exceptionally embarrassing and she couldn't find it in herself to be the one to approach the situation on her own. Especially when Optimus couldn't answer the woman's question of "Why?" Though she didn't think it was a bad kind of ignoring, more or less neither knew what to do now. Optimus had a war to fight and had bigger and greater things to worry about than something as trivial as romance. Especially with such an insignificant human. She didn't know how she could be expected to know how to approach the situation. Y/N didn't feel important enough to know something like that.