The Bully

Finally

Seconds were minutes and minutes were hours. The time was passing very slowly at class today. Couldn't concentrate. Couldn't listen. Couldn't do anything normally. My palms were sweaty, my weak arms were heavy (vomit on my sweater already, mom's spaghetti). No, but for real. I was nervous as hell. My stomach hurt all day.
At english class the teacher asked me a question that just put me in an even more stressed out state:"When was the last time you've been at the library, Taylor?" Not that question. Not me. Not today. Oh my...

When classes were over I stepped outside the school and waited. Rick was standing on my left, talking to Vic, who asked him:"Yo, Rick, do you have an umbrella?" Rick showed him the umbrella and said:"Well, I kinda need it." Vic looked at me, thought for a second, then responded:"Ooh, right! Yeah, okay see you tomorrow then!" On my right, there was Kellin, looking at me like I'm weird, wondering why I'm just standing there. And maybe it was a bit weird at first. I was just standing, looking at Rick. So you are probably womdering that as well: What exactly was I doing? Why was I so nervous?

Rick said goodbye to Vic and turned around to me:"Ready?" I probably blushed as I nodded:"Ready." Kellin was completely confused as he asked:"Ready for what??" So, I smiled:"We're going to the library." He was completely shocked, unable to say a thing, so he was just staring with his mouth slightly open. Taylor and Rick talk to each other?

"Do you have an umbrella?" he asked and I said:"Yes, wait, it's in my bag..." I wanted to reach into my bag, but he stopped me:"No, no! Hop under mine." Dude. Fuck. Yeah. So we started walking and one of our teachers saw us and just couldn't believe her eyes. "Where are the tides taking you two?" she asked and Rick smiled:"Library." That made the look on her face full of confusion. Rick + Taylor? +Library??

The walk continued. The talk continued. Fuck me. He was so close. Everytime we looked at each other while talking, I got lost a bit. His voice was causing goosebumps. His attention was on me. His eyes were looking deeply into mine. Those freckles. Those strands of hair falling on his face. And all his imperfections make him look even more godlike. Those little imperfections proove that he is actually human and not some perfect creature from the supernatural world. Yes, I'm aware that I'm in this deeply. Up to my throat deep. For a year and a half now.

In the library we were searching for some books that will help us understand something weird. Something a bit too specific to write it here (I'm saying this just as if the other things aren't specific enough). "Wait I'll check here..." I said and stopped when I saw that face on the other side of the bookshelf. That goddamned face. Not Rick's. It was Chris. He just waved at me and I waved back. But I won't forgive him for using me like that. "Who is it?" Rick asked and then came closer to check who's there. Rick also waved to him. Chris' face looked like he almost got a heart attack. He was at our school, so he knows what Rick's all about. Probably a shock for him too, to see the girl who was crushing on him two years ago, now outside with Rick. But we just continued searching for the books.

"Do you think we should ask or is that just going to be weird?" I asked him and he shrugged:"How much cringier can the cringe masters get?" So we went up to the librarians' desk. "Hello, how can I help you?" the friendly woman said and Rick told her what we are looking for. She wasn't expecting that:"Oh, um, well...yeah, come with me and we'll see what we have." So we followed her. And she showed us where to look. And another librarian came. And another one. And they were all searching where that type of books could be. Three librarians storming around the library, saying:"Hey, I found something here!" "Karen, do you think any of them are here?" "Perhaps, you should look over there." And it was all just because two stupid teens had a really weird conversation once. Or twice. Or maybe a few more times, but it doesn't matter.

Eventually, we found some books and borrowed them. "Do you need me to put them in your bag?" he offered and I said:"Yes, please." So he opened my bag and asked:"Should I put them in the first pocket?" I was okay with that, but I realized something. I widened my eyes and said:"Oh, no, no! Umm...the big pocket." Shit. My pads are in the first pocket. He just closed the first pocket and said:"Yeah, it's too small anyways." And in my mind I was already chopping my head off. I'm glad he was behind and I couldn't see his reaction.

Then we went for a walk around the town and I loved it. Rain sounds on the umbrella, calm atmosphere, walking close to him under his umbrella so that our arms were slightly touching, talking about random stuff, ocasionally looking at each other...perfection. Even though it wasn't a date and it was supposed to be just a two-friends-hang-out, it was more than enough for me. I was satisfied. Never before has a guy respected me like this.

It felt like we are the only ones in this world. Like it's all about us. And we came across a big puddle, so I wanted to just jump over it, but he stopped me:"No, come here, the puddle is huge!" And he waited for me to come back under his umbrella. Instead of walking on, he literally waited. What? People do that? Awesome.

"Do you want me to walk you to the bus stop?" he asked a few minutes before my bus was supposed to come. I didn't want to complicate, so I just said:"If you want to." He smiled:"Sure, no problem!" On our way we saw my classmates Matt and John. You guessed it! They were confused as well. John just passed us by with a suspicious expression, while Matt just greeted me, rising his eyebrows in confusion.

When the walk was over, my classmates Melanie and Naomi were looking away from us, trying to hold back laughter. They are suspecting my crush. Then Berth approached us and we talked for a while, also took a photo. Kathy also came to say hi and so did Leiah.

Luckily, my parents suspect nothing. Dad would kill me. I don't even want to imagine what he would do if he'd figure out about this.

But this day was so perfect...

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RL friends: don't y'all dare to mention this to anyone, because I don't want Rick to know that I told this to friends. Just act like you know nothing about this. Thank you.
And to the others: thanks for reading, means a lot <3
If any of you didn't get the mom's spaghetti thing: