Hidden Pain (BoyxBoy-Jastin)

Is Anybody Out There ?

The room went silent instantly as the words leave Justin’s mouth. ‘He rape me’. The words keep repeating on Ryan’s mind. He couldn’t move, he even stop breathing for a while. Justin didn’t know what to do. He didn’t look up to his shock friend. He knows Ryan is going to go crazy with what he just told him. but he just couldn’t keep it anymore. Ryan always know how crack him, make him tell every little problems he have. They’ve been best friend for so long. Ryan could practically read Justin well.

“Wha..what did you just say?” Ryan ask not believing what his best friend just told him. He didn’t want it to be true actually, he was hoping he heard wrong. Justin look up to his friends with his broken eyes. His eyes started to water again.

“He rape me Ryan!” he yell. “He fucking rape me okay!” he yell again as he pulls at the end of his hair getting frustrated with this situation, he started to feel harder to breath. Ryan noticed that Justin is going to have a panic attack. He engulf Justin in to a warm hug as Justin cry in to his chest.

“Shhh buddy. I’m here. Just let it all out.” He coo. He couldn’t help but to shed a tear thinking about what his best friend have been through. Ryan can’t even think straight. He wanted to asks Justin more on what had happen but he knows he can’t push Justin now, he’s in fragile state. Justin cried for 10 minutes as he keeps repeating ‘I hate it Ry.’  Justin pull back as he sniffle. He wipes his tears stain cheek. His eyes hurts so much from all the crying.

Ryan reached out a tissue and lend it to Justin. He waited for Justin to calm down for a few minutes. He then took a deep breath.

“How long?” he ask making Justin stop his movement of drying his tears. Justin gulp, and look down his lap. “I don’t even know Ry, I don’t remember.” He whisper. Ryan eyes widen.

“You mean he’s done it so many fucking time?!” Ryan yelled loudly. Getting upset, angry and mostly mad.

“Yeah.” Justin whisper again. He didn’t have the strength to talk anymore. He’s tired.

Ryan rub his face in frustration. He took a deep breath as he’s about to lose control any second.

“I’m going to kill that fucking bastard!” he growl as he got up. Justin stood up instantly in front of his upset friend.

“No! You can’t let him know that you know about this.” Justin said shaking his head variously.

“You expect me to act like nothing happen? What the hell Justin? I’m going to end this. That fucking bastard rape you!” he growl.

“You think I don’t know that Ryan?! He rape me! Me! But do you really think I would’ve just let him if I have other choice? I would live this fucking mess up life I have now if I have a choice?” Justin yelled as angry tears stream down his face.

“We can tell the others. They could help Justin. You know they can.” Ryan said softly. He didn’t want to pressure Justin anymore.

“I don’t know Ry. He would hurt my mom. I don’t want that to happen.” Justin sighs.

“He’s just scaring you Justin. We report this to the police and he’ll be in jail in no time.” Ryan said confidently.

“It’s not just simple threats Ryan. He has a gun okay. If he’s not dangerous, he wouldn’t have that carry with him all the time. I’m not risking anyone’s life Ryan. Just another 2 months and the I’ll be out of here, everything will be okay.” He said trying to reassure himself.

“Another 2 months? And then what Justin? Do you really think you could live a normal life after that? Do you really think, it’ll be just another bad dreams to forget? You’d be broken Justin. You’re broken now. Can’t you see it? What makes you think that you going to last that long? You almost killed yourself just now. You’re hating yourself! You think the others didn’t notice how you’ve been so distant, so sensitive and so troubled?” Ryan question.