Me of Tomorrow

First Date

Our first date is finally happening. Although Axon asked me out two weeks ago, it kept on getting pushed back because of his busy schedule. I still don't know what he does for work or anything about him besides his name and where his flat is and I almost got convinced he's just playing with me but everytime the thought crosses my mind, his messages come in as if he could magically read my mind reassuring me that he's still up for the date and that he's really interested in me so what's this helpless man got to do? After patiently waiting the day has come.

It'll be the second time that I get to see Axon not counting the night when I got drunk on the club and woke up on his place. If there's anyway to put what I'm feeling right now it's in between being excited, nervous and having a cold feet, literally. Should I just back out and tell him I don't think this a good idea anymore and that this is probably a mistake? I mean, what can he get from me? I'm a 27 year old man who works part time on a cafe and a fast food chain. I'm old and penniless. I'm not even that good looking. I look like a stick next to him. Axon's like the literal representation of a Greek God, that model from the magazine you'd have wet dreams over. He deserves a beautiful, Victoria's Secret model not an Elliot Price who looks like he hasn't eaten meat for years. 

I was fiddling with my phone on my pocket when a car honks from the outside signalling Axon's arrival. Usually, I'd hate bothering my neighbors with the noise but with my nerves right now, I couldn't care less. He could honk as much as he can but it wouldn't change how anxious I am for this date. I have never been on anything close to a date. My past relationship had been built through dorm movies and naughty touching mostly the reason why it has ended up badly as well. Axon might just be really experienced to know all of these things. He never came off as an amateur who's just experimenting. He knew what to say and what to do at every moment. Just with his text messages, the other could feel contented. 

When I reached the main entrance, I can easily see how well-dressed he is for the date. He's on a button up with sleeves rolled up on his arms and paired with black pants that's just highlighting his firm legs. He is bad for my health. I don't think I can get by this date without making a fool out of myself by drooling while staring at him. I should've worn my best shirt or maybe the pants I've been keeping for special occasions. No, I should've borrowed some of Ty's fancy clothes. "Hi, Elliot." I can't help the blood rushing to my cheeks. 

"A-Axon, hi." What am I? A freaking teenager? Why am I even stuttering? 

Axon shoots me with his sexy smile and opens the shotgun's door of his car. "Would you care to join me for a ride?" 

"Thanks."

I was able to take a whiff of his cologne while getting inside the car and I tell you, it's tantalizing. He smells like a mixture of spice and chocolates. It was almost as if he's a walking aphrodisiac. I need to calm myself if I want this date to turn out decent. I'm afraid I'd end up jumping him because I'm too deprived of skin contact.

"So, how have you been Elliot?" His eyes are on the road but I can feel his full attention on me which makes me kind of conscious. 

"I've been well, Axon."

He hums as response. "I want to ask you more but I don't want to ruin the rest of the date. I'll just settle for that first." I can't stop myself from smiling at him. "One thing though; rock, pop, ballad or blues? Or maybe EDM?" He's asking me what to play on the car stereo but I don't really listen to music much to know which genre I like best. "Anything? I'm not really picky." It's half truth but he seemed satisfied with it. He flipped through his phone at a stop light and a soft, indie music started playing.  "A recommendation. I can see you're not really a fan of music so take this as my gift to welcome you to the world of inspiration and just the usual teen angst." He didn't tell me the title of the song and I didn't bother looking at the screen to read it but he had a good choice. I really liked the tune and was able to follow the lyrics making me emotional a little bit. It's about two lovers who fell out of love as the time passed by. 'There were no reasons, we just loved too much until there's nothing to give anymore and we ended up so full of it, we had enough.' It's the kind of love that's hard to get over with once it ended. It's the kind of love I pray I'd never experience. 

We arrived at a fancy restaurant across the city that just made me feel more under-dressed. I was wrong to think that Axon is not that rich. He's exactly that kind of rich. How else would he know this kind of place? Isn't this a Michelin Star restaurant? Not even Sarah could afford to dine in here. 

The place was oddly deserted for being a known restaurant. I was even ready to be judged by the staffs but fortunately, they are all minding their businesses and politely smiling at us. "Good Afternoon Mr. Mayers, Mr. Price. Your reservation is this way." A guy in similar black suit as the others greeted us from the entrance and leads us to the other side of the restaurant with a more private setting. I look at Axon and he looks calm. He has planned this more thoroughly than I thought. The waiter even knew my name. 

As we sat and placed our orders (more like he picked for me), we began asking each other questions that we've probably been holding on since the first time we saw each other. Axon made his query first. "What keeps you busy, Elliot?" He's asking what my work is. It's probably the best question since he knows my name already and where I live. 

I bite my lips, contemplating how to answer him. "I just got fired, actually. Now I'm working at the cafe where we first met and at the fast food chain two blocks away from it." I peeked at him and his eyebrows furrowed for a second before it was replaced with a look of understanding then a small smile. "I want to know more of how that came about. I can feel it wasn't that simple but I'll let you have your turn first. Shoot it." I already know what to ask him. It has been weighing on me since I woke up at his flat. "How old are you, Axon?" 

An unreadable emotion passed on his handsome face before he once again smiled at me. "I don't actually want to make things turn this way but I have to be honest. I don't want things to be awkward between us, Elliot and I want you to know that no matter what I'm interested in you even before I came to know what your name is." I was getting nervous with the way he said these things. Was there something wrong with my question? Unless he's- "I'm 22 years old." 

"Oh." A five-year difference. I don't expect us to be quite that far apart. I could swear he looked mature enough to be considered at least 26. "You've just graduated college?" 

He nods. "I'm currently taking my Master's degree." 

Another thing to be shocked about. I take a glance at Axon and realizes he actually does look his age; young, fresh and full of dreams. Far from someone like me who already withered with lost hopes and uncertain future. 

"Elliot." I look at Axon. No matter how hard I try to hold myself back from crying, I can't help but feel so pathetic. I was once like him, someone with a vision, ready to take the world. Now I am no one. Axon was alarmed when I started crying. He rushed to my side and pulled me to his chest even without knowing the reason I'm crying in the first place. "I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, Elliot." No, I should be the one apologizing. I ruined our date. I'm so embarrassed but I can't form any words, I can't stop my tears from falling.