Goodbye Henry

Are you okay?

I played back my voice mails to Henry before he was found. I listened to the fear in my voice. Me holding back tears. I remember leaving them and thinking I had to sound calm, as if Henry hadn't known me his whole life and would of been able to tell I was frantic. I still wished he was okay. He disappeared so randomly. It was strange. One minute he was walking away from me and the next being uncovered near a tree in our close by forest. It was dark. I hated thinking of him being left there alone. In the dark and cold, all alone. I hated that.

My voicemail replaying interrupting my thoughts.
"Henry? Henry please answer. I need to know your okay. Are you okay Henry?" I left that one last. My voice was quiet and shaky as the fate of Henry not returning became more and more plausible. I switched off my phone and lay back. The silence ate at me. I hated this. I hated everything recently though.

One of my biggest fears was that when Henry met Kyra he would leave me. He didn't at first, and he didn't fully. He just distanced. She took up a lot of his time, being his girlfriend and all I understood. I wasn't too bothered. I still walked to school with him and home but he didn't stay as long as usual and that was fine. I wasn't going to be complaining. I wasn't left out per day either. There were times I missed it though. I was the one he ran to with all problems and I mean all. It could of been anything, big or small. It was sad when that stopped. I stopped receiving spontaneous phone calls about good or bad things. The morning texts and even evening too. I missed him. I was still around him each day so he wasn't gone but he wasn't there as much as he was. I guess there was a small relief when he and Kyra ended, I would get my Henry back. I was sad to see him hurting and not be quirky and enlightening per usual but I got to see him more and more and things returned to normal.

Well mostly normal. Normal until he vanished. I guess your wondering what actually happened to Henry Rogers. He went home as usual after being round mine and I expected him to be okay, because he always was. Even in the morning when he didn't show i stayed optimistic but that was stupid. Henry was walking home and went his normal way along the forest. The forest was about 5 minutes from his house. That's one of the worst parts, had he maybe left earlier that day or walked a little faster he could of made it home and still been okay. 5 minutes from being fine. Instead Henry didn't leave earlier that day, he didn't walk the slightest bit faster and so he didn't miss the car swerve. The stupid white car. It swerved out of control and took Henry's life. The driver is now in prison because not only did he hit Henry and admit his mistakes he took his body Deep into the forest and Hid him. Hid him to try and get away with it. I hated him for that. Henry was laying all alone for 4 or so days because one evil person couldn't admit a failure and save a lot of hope. I hope he gets what he deserves.

"Are you okay?" My mums soft voice calls from my door frame. She stood with her hand holding the door steady and the other ready to pull it closed when I tell her "I'm fine" for the 100th time, not only the "I'm fine" but the I'm fine partnered with my same fake smile. If I smiled I was okay right? So she'd leave. This time though, I hesitated. I wanted to tell her to come and sit with me and tell me again it would be okay or maybe watch a movie with me to give me a breather of space to maybe try and forget this unstructured reality, only for a second at least. I hesitated long enough for her to ever so slightly push my door that inch wider. I moved my eyes from watching her to my repositioned door which made her give me a questioning look.
"Yeah, fine" I blurted out finally. I didn't invite her in, I hadn't done that for 2 years so maybe now wasn't best.
"Okay sweetie, call if you need anything" she smiled like usual and glanced at the door while closing it slowly, giving me the change to reconsider. We both knew I wanted to but also both knew I wouldn't.
"Oh, Daniel is bringing pizza over, you want any?" She opened my door quickly to fit in the sentence before I returned to my daydream.
"Oh maybe I'll just go to Hen-" I stopped myself. How did I actually just mistake that? Henry was dead, his funeral in 4 days how did I just confuse that. I sat shocked at myself. I didn't cry, not just then. I couldn't believe myself. I was also in shock because it was the first time I realised how long it would take for me to get over Henry's death.
"Oh honey" mum burst in to my side. I let her hug hold me this time and I didn't push her away. I didn't know what to think, or how to break this silence.
"Guess I'll take that pizza then" I laughed a quiet laugh and mum released me.
"Okay" she smiled softly and retreated out my room like before. I didn't turn back to my desk right away. I was still kind of in shock at myself.
I was happy it was Sunday now though, I can't go back to Monday's usual check up from Mrs Hunt and everyone who slightly knew about Henry.