Hollywood Journey

Good Birth Control

"Willow..." I walk into the house, throwing all my work stuff on the ground, looking in the kitchen "Are you spoon feeding a doll?

"Yeah."

"Do I want to know why?"

"It's for health class. They decided we need to take care of these dumb babies all weekend."

I walk up closer, realizing that she has some of Zane's baby clothing on the doll, along with the original clothing soaked sitting next to her. She looks pretty pissed off since the doll is still crying even though she's trying to feed it.

"Maybe you should hold the baby. You know, comfort it instead of just force feeding it."

I walk in to check on the boys who are play fighting with every single toy they own, only to turn around and almost run into Willow who is trying to hand me the doll. I gently push her away, knowing I can't be doing this for her.

"That is your responsibility, not mine. I will help with it so you can eat and stuff, but you need to see what it's really like having a baby."

"Okay, well then I want help from Julian. He should have to go through this too."

"You do have a good point..."

"Good. So I'll call and tell him to sleep over."

"Hold up! I didn't agree to that."

"Jen, he won't understand fully unless he is up all night too."

I think about it for a while, agreeing that he won't get the full point of the assignment if he isn't living off of 2 hours of sleep, and give in knowing it's going to be good birth control as well.

She invites him over with Lisa's permission, and I sit back watching the two of them struggle to keep this annoying thing quiet since it never stops crying.

"Hey, why are Willow and Julian talking about throwing some screaming doll into the pool?" Brad walks in from work, finding me making dinner "Do I even want to know?"

"She has to take care of the doll over night for a health class assignment. The teacher can control when it's crying and why, so she's ready to go crazy, and she wanted Julian to help."

"Well, if there's a way to kill a doll, the two of them are going to do it." He leans in for a kiss quickly before going to check on the boys.

"Okay so now I have a much more important question," He walks out of the playroom carrying Zane "Why are these two telling me how excited they are that Julian is sleeping over? I never agreed to that."

"Because Willow pointed out that he should need to help with the baby and especially overnight. Lisa and I agreed that's the best way to get the best birth control, so he's staying over tonight."

"Do I get any say in this? Are you two even thinking? Two TEENAGERS up all night."

"We talked about that, we aren't stupid, Brad. We came up with a plan."

"Oh yeah? What's the plan?"

"Nolan is going to stay in his room, with the doll, where Willow and Julian will also be sleeping. Nol never sleeps anyway, so they won't try anything in front of him, and even if they would, you know he would be over telling us the second it happens."

"I still don't like the idea. They could sneak over to her room, or the guest room..."

"The guest room is so full of boxes from us trying to move that I would be happy if they snuck in there because they would be forced to organize it."

He walks outside, obviously not enjoying my comments, so I grab Nolan and follow him, letting the boys play in the yard as Brad angrily questions Willow and Julian since he is NOT on board with this idea at all.

"Why should I let the two of you sleep in the same house?"

"Because Jen already said we can... and she stuck us with your kid on top of this possessed doll."

"Nolan already asked me to sleep in his bed with him," Julian tries to help the situation "So we won't really be near each other."

"Yeah, daddy!" Nolan runs over getting excited "Julian sleep with me! And we can play cars alllll night!"

I give Brad a knowing look, having clearly thought this whole thing through, waiting for him to give in and admit it's a good idea.

"This is the best birth control they'll get. A baby that won't shut up, no sleep, and a toddler not letting them sleep the few minutes the baby is actually quiet."

"I'm sleeping in the hall."

"Mama!" Zane rushes up, crashing into my legs "I play Willz baby!" He screams in my face the second I pick him up. I hand him over to Willow, letting her deal with this.

"Just remember, it's even harder having two. And he's real so you can't ignore him."

"Here you go, run around with it for a while." Willow hands off the doll to Zane, who immediately drags it across the yard as he runs around in circles. Brad and I watch in amazement that the thing isn't screaming again.

"You're right. They'd be terrible parents."

"When am I ever not right?"

I lean into his welcoming arms as we watch the disaster in front of us unfold. The baby is now crying again, so Willow told Julian it's his turn to help, but since it's her assignment and he says he got it to stop crying last time, he hands it to her after a few minutes and walks over to stop the boys argument.

"I don't think we have much to worry about, babe." I turn towards Brad as Willow gives up, telling us she's going to take the baby for a drive "She's pissed and it's only been 6 hours."

"I really hope this works because the boys definitely were not this bad. I hope she remembers this and not them."

"Honey, the boys were this bad at times. You just chose to help with other things while I calmed them."