"Clara?" Heather asked tentatively from the pilot's seat as Clara stared dead ahead, her knuckles turning white as she gripped the jet's controls far too tightly. "You okay?"
"Hmm." Was the only response Heather was met with as Clara continued to stare straight ahead, rarely blinking.
"Are you sure? Is there anything on your mind?" Heather prompted again as Clara was still acting uncommonly distant.
"Mmmm."
"Is it him?"
"Of course it's him." Clara retaliated, spitting her words out venomously causing Heather to shift back in her seat.
"You want to talk about it?"
"No."
"Okay."
"How am I expected to just continue with my life like nothing ever happened?" Clara spouted, "That's clearly what he wants because I've been back in his life for almost a full day now and he hasn't even spoken to me. He can barely look me in the eye!"
"I know but-"
"Are we even together anymore? Because when I left the 40s I assumed he was dead, neither of us actually 'broke up' with the other but I don't feel like I have a boyfriend. Am I being crazy? Of course we're not together. People in relationships talk to each other and until this morning I hadn't even seen him in five years!"
"I don't know what to say-"
"Does he even remember me? He seemed to remember Steve. How could he not remember me? After everything we went through how can he not remember me but remember Steve? That's not fair, right? I can't blame Steve, they were best friends, after all. But how can he not remember me, Heather?"
"I know, Clara-"
"It's like I don't exist. It's like I have been dead for these past five years. Like I'm the one with memory loss."
"But it's him that's-"
"And I know it's him who's lost his memory but in his head, I've been erased. I haven't existed for the last five years. Am I a stranger to him?" Clara asked, turning to Heather. Her voice was now surprisingly soft and as Clara turned her head towards Heather, she understood why. Clara's eyes were spilling with tears that she tried to choke back but all it did was strain her voice.
"He looks just like Bucky." Clara sobbed.
"He is." Heather comforted, leaning towards Clara to place a gentle hand on her knee.
"He's not." Clara choked on her words as they left her throat. She shook her head frantically as she tried to brush away tears but with each wave she washed away, a new one would fall.
"What do you mean?" Heather encouraged quiety, prompting Clara to keep talking, despite the fact she was sniffing and sobbing as her shoulders rose and fell uncontrollably.
"That's not him. The things he's done, it's not him anymore. It's the Winter Soldier. But it looks so much like him!" Clara wailed, throwing her head down in her hands and resting them on her lap. All Heather could do was place a comforting hand on Clara's trembling back as she shook with each gasping whimper.
Suddenly, Heather's hand was thrown off of Clara as she snapped upright, lifting her head to stare at Heather widely. She just sat there, unmoving for a full minute before she opened her mouth. But no words came out, she just sat there gaping with that pitiful look in her eyes that all people on the verge of tears have.
"Do I tell Tony?" She asked softly.
"What?" Heather asked, taken aback.
"Do I tell Tony about Bucky? I read that file...about Howard Stark. Do I tell Tony?" Clara explained, fixing her eyes once again on Heather, looking at her desperately imploring her to give her an answer. Just as Heather opened her mouth Clara started talking again. "The answer's no, right? He won't handle all this as well as I have." Clara said, brushing a tear from the corner of her eye.
"I don't really know what happened..." Heather said, fumbling for the right words to comfort Clara. Heather didn't know what to do but she sure as hell knew Clara wasn't handling this well.
"No, I can't tell Tony. He'll freak out and lash out and I just got Bucky back...if it's him." Clara said, sniffling again at the mention of the man she clearly still loved. Heather reached out and took Clara's hand, squeezing it in her own. "Thanks Heather."
"Hey, what are friends for?" Heather smiled, "Or your friend's grand-daughter." She teased. Clara's mouth lifted slightly into a small smile. She drew her hand away from Heather's and wiped her eyes, blinking hard to stop herself from crying any more.
"I should look for a place to land. We're almost at the facility now." Clara explained, gripping the controls tightly again and staring straight ahead out of the wide windowscreen. "Once we find them, I'm getting them all micro-chipped."
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Redeem | Bucky Barnes x OC | (3)
FanfictionThird in the Timeline series | After being told she was the infamous Agent 4, that every S.H.I.E.L.D agent thought was a rumour, Clara decides to get back in the field. Her old boss, and presumed dead, Phil Coulson guides her as she reunites with ol...