Looking For Our Stars

Pain Demands to be felt

I read Miles, email a few times, and it seemed to click. I figured out why he likes me, its because some part of me reminds me of that girl, whats her name... California? No, I will think of it later. He can't treat me like i'm eye candy, I do not reply back all I can think about is Katelyn, I havn't seen her in over two years, I pick up my phone and dial her number.

"Hello?" Kaitlyn says.

"Hey Kaitlyn its Hazel," 

"Hazel Grace Lancaster? Is that you?" Kaitlyn asked

"I just said who I was."

"I wish I could talk, I relaly do, its just that I'm going to the mall with a girl I babysit her name is Jacklyn, Bye!" Kaitlyn hung up and so did I. I then remembered Jacklyn when Kaitlyn and I went to the mall, she tried on my breathing tube.

I knew I hurt him, its just I couldn't bare, to think of ever dating someone besides Augustus ever, even though, I loved the book An Imperial Affiction. But to go with someone besides Augustus isn't right... Is it? I wandered around pacing in my room till the oxygen started feeling light I tried to adjust my tube but it wouldn't work, everything started to get fuzzy.

"MOM! HELP!" I screamed with my last breath, I saw my mother, running up the stairs grabbing me before I fell as she hurdled me in her arms she reached for her phone. 

[beep beep beep beep] I herd the sound of the hospital, I slowly opended my eyes, and saw my mother sleeping on a pull out couch I rubbed my eyes and felt a tube on my chest. My mother started to wake up and she almost jumped to her feet, to run up to hug me.

"HAZEL!" she cried hugging me with tears dripping down her face.

"Mom? What happend?" I asked her.

"Hazel, you went unconsis, for a pretty long time your oxygen tank ran out. The lack of air got to your brain and you went to panick mode. But your going to be fine, I promise. "Small tumer growth, you had one surgery, and that is all its so far decreasing. Just remember Hazel you survived anathor day." I rolled my eyes and was about to get out of bed when the nurse walked, she looked at me then dropped the trey and ran over to me.

"Hazel! Get back in bed!" the nurse screamed at me, 

"DOCTOR MARIA!" the nuse called. Then Dr.Maria came in.

"Hazel? You went unconsis, for almost two weeks, you cant just get up after something like that happend!"

"Listion I don't have time to be here, nor do I want to, can I just leave?" I asked

"Hazel your not fully oxgenated yet, you need to stay in bed till your at ease with your body, Okay?"

"Okay." Doctor Maria left and my mom sat right by my bed."Hazel? a friend came to see you a few days ago, while you were unconsis, he brought you flowers."  She handed me the flowers and I looked at them, they were a brownish green.

"They are hazeld coloring, he said he did it himself."

"Issac?" I asked

"No, he said his name was Miles Halter, he is a lung cancer patient too you know?"

"Because he smokes, I dont want to be influenced by that rubbish!"

"Calm down, your only going to be here till your body is under control."

"MOM! DON'T YOU GET IT? MY BODY IS FULL OF CANCER! I WILL NEVER BE UNDER CONTROL, OKAY?"

"Hazel, calm down," My mother said

"Mom? Pain demands to be felt," I told her as she walked out.