ON THE ROAD

Hallie

Darkness had filled every empty space of my room.

From my window, I could see the lighthouse located next to the pier. I used to envy boats who always had a guide. They knew where they came from and where they were going. Unlike me...

No matter how dull and predictable my life was, I could never truly catch the essence of it. I was not driven by passion or tempted by adventure. My rushes of adrenaline came from movies or stories from other people's lives. Everyday was the same, yet I didn't have a clue what my life would look like after high school. I breathed to be alive, not to live.

In summer, I used to drive, at night, to the desert to watch the stars. Surrounded by the wild, far from the city lights, I could feel the infinity all around me. My knees always felt a little week thinking that few were the things surrounding me that had an end. I felt alone with the Universe, time and my soul, all infinite.

Sometimes, I allowed myself to dream. But most of the time, I tried not to think of anything. Because, under the stars, I felt invincible, as if my dreams could come true. That's when it became dangerous. I have never been strong. And there is nothing more painful than a breaking heart. So, I laid quietly, pushing away the thoughts that could slowly kill me.

A loud giggle, followed by a hushing sound made me come back to Earth. In the street below me were two girls, holding hands. Their obvious happiness made me smile. One of the girls pulled on the other's hand to stop her from going further. They looked at each other for a second, before slowly bringing their heads closer together. When their mouths met, I knew fireworks had exploded in their stomachs. It was passionate, raw, feverish, but they loved it. I could sense the love. It was everywhere from their entwined fingers to their bodies pressing so close even air couldn't get between them. I was hypnotized by their kiss, by the beautiful feeling they shared.

In a second, she ruined it.

« -Ladies, we are not in a cabaret! I will ask you to leave, right now. May our Lord Jesus Christ forgive you for your sins », spit out my mom, furious.

The two girls looked at her in disbelief before slowly walking away, still holding hands.

I angrily pulled my curtains. As if Jesus Christ cared about stupid humans' romances. My mother probably wore a proud smile on her face like she always did when accomplishing something she believed was good. At that moment, I wished I could've ripped that smile right off her face. But, as always, I kept my mouth shut and simply went to bed. I ignored the two tears rolling down my face. I didn't want to believe they could've meant something.

Before I could count to ten sheeps, I heard a noise. Coming from outside. From my window facing our backyard.

At first, I thought it was the girls coming back seeking revenge.

When I opened the window, my jaw dropped.

I could've never imagined.

Standing in the wet grass was a ghost from the past.

Maxine. Her hair was floating around her head. Not like a halo. Like a dark storm.

The black mass around her face foreshadowed the worst that was yet to come. But, after every storm comes the blue sky. In all the gloominess was also hidden the beauty we were to find.

But at that time, I saw none of that.

I simply opened my window wider and waited for her to climb up. Just like we did in the good old days.

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For a moment, I wondered if I had entered into some kind of parallel universe, or accidentally stepped into a time machine.