Walk All Over You

Chapter Nine

Watching Nikki, watching every movement he made, every blink he blinked, every breath he took, I couldn't help but admire him. He was scary, yet sexy when he was mad, it was nothing but a turn on. His face was peachy and his eyes were glowing green, like he could turn into the Incredible Hulk at any given moment.

"What's crawled up his ass and died?" Duff whispered from behind me, he just happened to be sitting in the row of chairs, directly behind me.

"Beats me." I lie, feeling my stomach become tight. I held too many secrets from too many people, it was hard for me to open up to somebody and Nikki knew that very well. I frustrated him at times, especially like I had this time. Well what was I to say? Oh yeah, the guys you're touring with. Yeah your mates, they're the ones who treated me like shit. Easy thinking, harder in reality. Not to mention, these guys couldn't afford another brawl, especially not with this band.

"He's been like that since we got back onto the road. Maybe there's something going around, I mean we all have been getting a bit annoyed lately. Not to mention all of the late nights, the alcohol abuse and the travelling around, it takes a hell of a lot out of you." I reason, trying not to act so conspicuous. It seemed that every time he had been mad, it had been right afterwards talking to me. Maybe I wasn't good for him; maybe I was slowly making him more aggressive every time we spoke. But he knew very well, when I didn't want to talk about things, to drop the subject. This time he did the complete opposite and kept going on and on, begging, demanding me to tell him the antagonists.

"Maybe he's jealous." Duff implies the amused tone in his voice.

"Jealous?" I scoff, feeling impulsive to Duff's predicament.

"Yeah I mean; we've been having your attention a lot lately. Best friends do get jealous you know." He reasoned, he made a lot of sense, I knew exactly what he was talking about. I had felt jealous over Nikki when other girls had his attention, but I needed to learn to let it go and not take it to heart. That would be one of the worst things I could ever do, take it to heart.

"Duff, you're making a heap of sense; but I really don't think that's it. I mean he's Nikki Sixx for god's sake, he's got everything he wants, he's got the money, the sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll. What else would he be jealous of that he doesn't have."

"Having everything, money, sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll; that may be a hell of a lot, and practically everything. But who's to say that brings happiness? There's always something or someone out there he wants but can't have for specific reasons. Maybe there's a certain someone in his life he wants but he can't have. I'm just saying the rock 'n' roll life isn't everything, it doesn't always bring enough satisfaction." He leans on the back of my chair, talking quietly in my ear. Luckily there was music blaring out through the entire bus so if anyone tried they couldn't pick up on our entire conversation. Maybe only specks here and there.

"Are you hinting at something or a specific someone Mr McKagan?" I turn my head to the side, connecting eyes with his.

"Not particularly. But maybe for a certain somebody else: maybe." He answered, his eyes flickering away from my own, then back again.

"You blokes are too confusing." I giggle.

"Hey; we ain't confusing at all. We're basically grouped into four things, booze, rock 'n' roll, women and food." Duff counted off four of his fingers, trying to make himself seem much more easier to understand.

"If anyone is confusing, it's you chicks." He states in a matter-of-factly tone.

"You're not making yourselves look out to be very classy, kind of bland and easy." I comment.